ALICE. ‘Robert, don’t hurt me. Oh, if Cosmo were to see you!’
COSMO. ‘Cosmo does see him.’ He says it in a terrible voice. Probably Cosmo has been to a theatre or two himself.
ALICE. ‘You here, Cosmo!’
She starts back from her assailant.
COLONEL, feeling a little foolish, ‘I didn’t hear you come in.’
COSMO, grimly, ‘No, I’m sure you didn’t.’
COLONEL, testily, ‘No heroics, my boy.’
COSMO. ‘Take care, father.’ He stands between them, which makes his father suddenly grin. ‘Laugh on, sir. I don’t know what this row’s about, but’—here his arm encircles an undeserving lady—‘this lady is my mother, and I won’t have her bullied. What’s a father compared to a mother.’
ALICE. ‘Cosmo, darling Cosmo.’
COLONEL, becoming alarmed, ‘My boy, it was only a jest. Alice, tell him it was only a jest.’