Oh, that was just thrown in to give additional effect to the tea!
Reader. It won’t do, sir—it won’t do! The deception was too transparent throughout.
Well, then, since you saw through it from the beginning, there is no harm done, and you can readily afford to make an apology for impugning my voracity.
Lady Reader. But who was the heroine? What became of her?
Ah! my dear madam, there you have me! I suspect she was a French countess, or more likely an actress engaged in the line of tragedy. Her style, at all events, was tragical.
Lady Reader (elevating her lovely eyebrows superciliously). She was rather demonstrative, it must be admitted. You brought her in apparently to fulfill your promise, but sent her off the stage very suddenly. You should, at least, have restored her to her friends, and not left her in that den of robbers.
That, dear madam, was my natural inclination; but the fact is, d’ye see, I was drugged—
Lady Reader (sarcastically). It won’t do, Mr. Butterfield—your heroine was a failure! In future you had better confine yourself to facts—or fresh water.
Madam, I’d confine myself to the Rock of Gibraltar or an iceberg to oblige you; therefore, with your permission, I shall proceed to give you, in my next, a reliable description of the Kremlin.