(Gives him clothes.)
Brown. Dress him in these! Why, bless you, I don’t know how. I’m not a lady’s maid.
Mary. Oh, never mind; you’ll manage very well! There, make haste, and do as I tell you.
Brown. Well, I’m only made to order, so I’ll try and do my best.
[Exit through the folding-doors into the passage, and then through the door beyond into kitchen.
Mary. (Sits at table, R. C.) Now to write to Widgetts and tell him of my melancholy end. (Writes and reads.) “Base man,—I have discovered the truth of your falsity, and know all about the lobsters and the cretur that’s to sup with you to-night. Oh, Widgetts, once, you swore to love none but Mary White; but now, your vows is blew to the winds. I sha’n’t trouble you no more with my mangled feelings, for I’m going to drown myself in the water-butt in your kitchen; where you’ll find me. Adieu, Widgetts! I forgive you; but I know that my ghost and them lobsters will sit heavy on your stomach to-night. So no more at present from your departed—MARY WHITE.”
Brown. (Coming into the passage from the kitchen and showing the figure dressed in the clothes given him by Mary.) Here she is. Will she do?
Mary. Oh! beautifully! Ha, ha, ha, ha! I can’t help laughing at the droll figure I cut. (Folds and directs the letter.) There lies the train that’s to blow up Widgetts. (Rises.) Now, Brown, we must pop her head downwards into the water-butt.
Brown. Well, that’s easily done.
Mary. (Widgetts heard singing in the street.) Hark! I hear Widgetts coming. Quick, we must get out by the back door quietly.