“‘Deplored as skirmishers!’” said the colonel softly. “Wonder how Stearns would like that bit of description.”
“Oh, I mos’ forgot tellin’ ’bout de disposition o’ de troops,” said Major Larry, suddenly recalling one of the chief’s requirements. “Near’s I c’d make out, de disposition o’ most of ’em was fine. Our fellies was disposed to knock de stuffin’ out’n de enermy, an’ if it hadn’t be’n for de cap’n and de lieutenants we’d have started a private dead-yard down in our corner w’en K‘s boys come chargin’ inter de woods.
“An’ dis brings me to de report o’ de share A took in de purceedin’s. Dis is w’at A done: de odder t’ree comp’nies was squattin’ down a-top o’ de t’ree little hills, an’ A was shooken out in a skirmish line, down ’long by de bridge, to make it unhealt’y for de furriners w’en dey come promenadin’ ahead to cross de river.
“Major Pollard, he comes ridin’ down from de hills, an he says, ‘Cap’n Stearns,’ says he, ‘w’en you’re drove back from dis position, youse’ll fall back down de road here, an’ take y’r command into de cover o’ de woods on our right flank dere,’ pointin’ at it wid his sword. ‘Dat’s a strong position,’ says he, ‘an’ de div’l himself couldn’t drive yer out’n it if dis was really bizness. By doin’ dis youse’ll purtec’ our flank from bein’ turned, an’ at de same time’ll uncover de front of us, so’s dat we c’n play fire-works wid de enermy’s advance. See?’ An’ de cap’n said he seen, an’ later he done so.”
Here Larry armed himself with the long, tapering pointer, and then proceeded with his narrative. “W’en I come up to reenforce de comp’ny, de enermy was jus’ marchin’ down to shove us away from de bridge. It was a dandy sight! De two battalions looked bigger’n brigades, an’ de colors was wavin’, an’—” here Larry was caught by a sudden inspiration—“an de colonel was lookin’ elegant, on a big, white hoss, an’—” with a second inspired utterance—“de newspaper men was hustlin’ ’roun’ an’ gettin’ on to everyt’ing!”
This bit of spirited description was most favorably received. The personages mentioned bowed their acknowledgments, while Langforth and Woodleigh and the adjutant applauded generously, and shouted in chorus, “Hear! Hear!”
“I’d make me oat’,” said Major Larry, thus encouraged, “dat dis is de bes’ regiment in de State. W’y, de odder regiments isn’t got no use at all for us! Dey isn’t in it wid us, an’ anybody wid bot’ eyes shut c’d tumble to dat. See?”
“You’re not disputed, Major Callahan,” said the colonel, clasping his hands across his chest. “Proceed with your report.”
“Well, de enermy kep’ moggin’ along down to de river,” said the boy obediently, “an’ w’en dey was gettin’ good an’ handy de cap’n assembled de comp’ny, an’ sung out, ‘Now youse’ll all set y’r sights at t’ree hunderd, an’ every popper’s boy of youse must take aim careful. For de nex’ act on de programme,’ says he, ‘is goin’ to be a volley exercuted by de full strengt’ of all de artists in de troupe.’”
“Hold up for a minute, Larry,” broke in the colonel, when this truly remarkable order was quoted. “Were those Captain Stearns’ exact words?”