Oh, what a shock were these tidings to one whose head was so full of romance and enthusiasm, and whose heart was brimming with sensibility and love!
He felt an utter prostration of every faculty, and a deadly coldness seemed to pass over the pulses of his heart. He arose, and laying on the table the last coin he possessed in the world, hurried forth without waiting for change, and, bent on some desperate deed, blind and reckless, with anger, agony and despair in his soul, he entered the dark shadowy avenue, and approached the old castellated mansion—the place of so many tender memories.
CHAPTER XXI.
LOVE AND MARRIAGE ARE TWO.
Oh, these were only marks of joy, forsooth,
For his return in safety! Were they so?
And so ye may believe, and so my words
May fall unheeded! Be it so; what comes
Will nevertheless come.
AGAMEMNON OF ÆSCHYLUS.
The shadows of the gloomy evening had deepened as he approached the ancient Place of Bruntisfield, and its dark façade, its heavy projecting turrets and barred casements, impressed him with additional sadness.
The wind sighed down the lonely avenue, and whirled the fallen leaves as it passed. Many a raven flapped its wings and screamed discordantly above his head, and all such sounds had a powerful effect on him at the time.
Confused, despairing, and feeling a sentiment of profound contempt and anger, struggling for mastery with his old and passionate love, his heart seemed about to rend with its conflicting emotions.
One sensation was ever present—it was one of desolation and loneliness—that he had nothing more to live for; that the world was all a blank. The light that had long led him on through so many miseries and dangers had vanished from his view: his idol was shattered for ever.
He felt that it was impossible to think with calmness; to tear from his breast the dear image and the cherished hopes he had fostered there so long—to exchange admiration for contempt—love for indifference. Oh, no! it could never be. Ages seemed to have elapsed since the sun had set that evening; while his parting with Lilian, the triumph of Killycrankie, the carnage of Steinkirke, and his mission from the King, seemed all the events of yesterday.