The Goblet's course in this business appeared not a little mysterious. It had supported Blake for post master—a man whose temperance professions were now regarded as entirely superficial and worthless—and Savage for Congress, a person more than suspected as being a moderate drinker and a man of boasted "liberal principles." Messrs. Harmon and Fogle put their dissatisfied heads together to discover the secret. They were aided and encouraged by the editor of the Freeman, and presently in an article in that paper headed, "How to make Tin Night-Caps out of Pine Shingles," the whole "black history of shameless fraud and double-dealing," as it was called, was revealed to an astounded public. We quote a few paragraphs from the Freeman's article:—
"Here," said the merciless reviewer, with genuine satire, "here is a beautiful instance of love and harmony in political life! Here is prophecy fulfilled. 'The lion and the lamb shall lie down together, and a little child shall lead them.' Savage—rightly named—is the lion. Blake—innocent, harmless, dove-like Blake, who never did anything wrong, is the lamb; and Atkins is the little boy. He leads them into sweet pastures of public office; and gives them to drink of Congress water and post-office pap. O happy trio! O honest and consistent coalition!
"What makes the union appear all the more admirable, is the fact that the most discordant elements have here been made to blend and intermingle. Savage is a moderate drinker, who loves his wine at dinner, and his punch before going to bed. Atkins is a stiff and uncompromising temperance man. One is Maine law, the other is Anti-Maine law. As for Blake, he is sometimes one, sometimes both, and sometimes neither one thing nor the other. But Atkins supports Savage. Savage supports Blake, and they all support each other.
"Now, as our grandmother used to say, 'wherever you see a turnip-top growing, you may be sure that there's a turnip at the bottom of it. Large or small, it's still a turnip.' Now, we have long admired the luxuriance of Savage, Atkins, Blake & Co.'s turnip-tops. We have recently been looking for the turnip, and lo! here it is! Who secured Savage's re-election? Blake, when at the last county convention of the Maine Laws, he advised them not to make an independent temperance ticket for Congress. Who devoted his paper to the cause of the moderate drinker? Atkins. Who got Blake the post-office? Atkins and Savage. But what are Savage and Blake doing for Atkins all this time? Is Atkins so unselfish as to work for them gratis? Nobody believes it! Where then does the milk in the cocoa-nut come from? Let us see.
"In the first place—we have it on the authority of an old lady who knows the genealogy of every family in the county, and can trace most people's ancestry back to Noah—Blake is Atkins's second cousin. There's one point. Now for another. Blake owns three-fourths of the entire Goblet printing establishment, and holds the property in such a way, that he can any day take the paper into his own hands, and manage it to suit himself! Therefore, whoever edits the Goblet, is Blake's tributary. We were going to say tool or slave, but concluded to sacrifice truth to politeness. Thus it happens that Atkins is only as it were Blake's left hand," &c.
After several more paragraphs of the same sort, the author of the annihilating article, who found it very difficult to conclude the subject, being of a very rich and attractive nature, finally summed up all his points, and bound them together with a striking original quotation, attributed to Shakspeare. It was as follows:
| "O consistency! thou art a jewel! Which, like the toad, ugly and envious. Bears yet a precious secret in his head." |
It was this mongrel quotation which damped the Freeman's powder. The Goblet took it up, turning the laugh against its rival; and for months the modern style of rendering Shakspeare was a standing joke. Of course a copy of the Freeman, containing the editorial marked, was sent to the Post Master General; but on reading about the toad at the end of the annihilating article, the Department dismissed the whole subject with a good-natured laugh.
Notwithstanding the truth of the charges against him. Blake was continued in office. 'Twas probably the fun of the thing that saved him.
Then followed a lull. The good people of Harrowfork were worn out with the harassing post-office question, and it was permitted to rest until the approach of the next Congressional election.