CHAPTER LVII — Hajji Baba meets with an extraordinary adventure in the bath, which miraculously saves him from the horrors of despair.
'So,' said I to my companion, as soon as we were left to ourselves, 'so I am indebted to you for this piece of happiness. If I had thought that this adventure was to have been the result of the mûshtehed's recommendation, you would never have seen Hajji Baba in this trim. What could it signify to you whether rain fell or no, or whether the Armenians got drunk or remained sober? This is what we have got by your officiousness.'
The mollah was in too pitiable a condition for me to continue upbraiding him any longer. We walked in silence by the side of each other in the saddest manner possible, until we reached the first village on our road. Here we made a halt, in order to deliberate upon what we should do. My unfortunate companion was expelled the city, therefore it was impossible for him to show himself in it until the storm had blown over; but as we were both very anxious to know what had become of our respective properties—he of his house and effects, I of my clothes, my money, and mule,—it was determined that I should return and gain the necessary intelligence.
I entered Tehran in the evening, and, making myself as little recognizable as possible, I slunk through the streets to the mollah's house. At the first glimpse I discovered that we were entirely ruined; for it was in possession of a swarm of harpies who made free property of everything that fell under their hands. One of the first persons whom I met coming from it was the very ferash who had been sent by the Shah to conduct us to his presence; and he was mounted on my mule, with a bundle in his lap before him, doubtless containing my wardrobe, or that of the mollah.
So borne down was I by this sight, and so fearful of being discovered, that I hurried away from the spot; and, scarcely knowing whither I was bending my steps, I strolled into a bath, situated not far from the house of our enemy the chief priest. I went in, undressed myself, and it being almost dark, I was scarcely perceived by the bathing attendants. Going from the first heated room into the hottest of all, I there took my station in a dark recess, unseen by any one, and gave free course to my thoughts. I considered to what I could now possibly turn my hands for a livelihood: for fortune seemed to have abandoned me for ever, and it appeared that I was marked out for the stricken deer, as the choice game of misfortune.
'I no sooner fall in love,' said I, musing, 'than the king himself becomes my rival, slays my mistress, and degrades me from my employment. I am the lawful heir to a man of undoubted wealth: he lives just long enough to acknowledge me; and although everybody tells me that I ought to be rich, yet I have the mortification to see myself cheated before my face, and I turn out a greater beggar than ever. The most devout and powerful man of the law in Persia takes a fancy to me, and secures to me what I expect will be a happy retreat for life: my master in an evil hour prays for the blessings of heaven to be poured upon us, instead of which we are visited with its vengeance, driven as exiles from the city, and lose all our property.' Never did man count up such a sum of miseries as I did when seated in the corner of the bath. The world seemed for ever gone from me, and I wished for nothing better than to die in the very spot in which I had nestled myself.
The bath had now been almost entirely abandoned by the bathers, when of a sudden a stir ensued, and I perceived a man walk in, with a certain degree of parade, whom, through the glimmering of light that was still left, I recognized to be the mollah bashi in person. Neither he nor his attendants perceived me; and as soon as he was left to himself (for so he thought) he immediately got into the reservoir of hot water, or the hazneh (the treasury), as it is called in the baths of Persia.
Here I heard him for some time splashing about and puffing with all his might; a sort of playfulness which struck me as remarkable for so grave and sedate a character; and then a most unusual floundering, attended with a gurgling of the throat, struck my ear.
I conceived that he might be practising some extraordinary bodily exercise, and curiosity impelled me to rise gently from my corner, and with all the precaution possible, to steal softly on the tips of my toes to the aperture of the reservoir, and look in.