PIFF. (c.) You know who I mean—your master. Peters. (Going to door c.) Not far off from where yours is I suppose.
(Exit Peters c.)
PIFF. Um! The master has been getting impertinent to me of late, so the servants seem to be following suit. (Shrugging his shoulders.) I shall throw this job up when I’ve made another hundred or two. I wonder how much longer he’s going to keep me waiting.
(Exit Piff. c.)
(Enter Allen r. creeping in cautiously in a mysterious and watchful manner. He has a huge pewter pot in one hand and a large church-warden clay pipe alight in the other. He looks round stealthily, listens, then crosses nervously and sits l. in easy chair. He stretches himself out as luxuriously as his tight clothes will allow—especially the collar. Takes a long pull at the pot and long puffs at the pipe. In the middle of each pull, grunts “good” in evident enjoyment.)
ALLEN. (Chuckling in a deep undertone. Crosses to c. and sits.) Ah-h-h, I’ve done un this time. He’s waiting upstairs to curl my hair. (Chuckling again.) Told un I’d come up when (grandly) I’d finished conducting my correspondence. (Chuckles, pulls at pipe, and takes a deep draught.) First time I’ve ever enjoyed myself since I came into my property. (Breaks out into some country ale-house sort of song, sings, warming as he goes on with great gusto.)
(Enter Piffin c., unseen by Allen. Piff. comes down and stands c. looking on. Allen finishes song and then buries his face in the pot. As his eyes emerge over the brim he catches sight of Piff. He remains looking at him for a while and then slowly puts the pot on the table.)
ALLEN. What do thee want? Didn’t I tell ’ee I wur going to conduct my correspondence, and that I didn’t want to be disturbed?
PIFF. (Goes up table.) I beg pardon, sir, but I thought maybe you had completed your correspondence, especially as there was only one letter this morning, and that was a circular about coals.
ALLEN. Oh, did you. Well, I ain’t you see. I’m going to write a lot of original correspondence this morning, and I’m collecting my thoughts. (Goes on smoking sulkily.)