True love never changes. From its nature it can not. It being that impulse which indicates an affectional need, it must be as unchanging as the soul and God. Take that known as maternal love, and who that has known a mother’s love will say that it demands for its life and continuance variety and change? Tell the mother, as she presses her first-born to her bosom, that she will soon demand change and variety to keep alive her maternal affection, and she would reply in the language of Macduff, “He has no children.” No, of all things else, true love will admit of no change, no variety.
In no affectional relation, save that of husband and wife, would the free lover admit that love required change or variety. In the parental, fraternal, filial, and social relations that doctrine does not apply. The parent loves his child, and feels no demand for variety.
What would be thought of that mother who should tire of loving her child, and give as an excuse that her tastes had changed; that once her child was suited to her maternal affection; but that now her maternal love had changed its character and quality, and demanded a corresponding change on the part of the object of its affection? It requires no argument to show that such can never be the requirements of maternal love. The same is true of every other manifestation of the affectional principle. Fraternal, filial, and social love will admit of no change; demand no variety. The brother and sister can love on and love forever; the parent and child can do the same; and true friendship abides in constancy of affection. But lust demands variety, and consequently change. When the true impulse is overlooked, and self-gratification becomes the end in pursuit, then comes with it the demand for variety. This is seen in eating and drinking. Hunger and thirst only call for simple food and drink. They will supply the demand. But the moment gratification is consulted, then great must be the change and large the variety. And by far the largest amount of labor and expense is bestowed upon gratification.
The same is seen in the social department. Those who, in their social intercourse, are seeking selfish gratification instead of the happiness and well-being of their associates, are those who demand variety; who themselves are cloying of one kind of amusement, and then demanding another. This principle of demanding change in food, in society, in amusement, etc., depends upon that condition known as cloyed; and it does not take place in respect to any need. The thirsty soul is never cloyed with drink until it ceases to be thirsty; the hungry soul with food until hunger ceases. But it is not thus with lust; it ceases to enjoy one means of gratification after another, while yet the demand mand for gratification continues. The same principles apply to the marriage relation. True conjugal love never changes. It can never change, because it must rest upon an unchangeable basis. The mode of begetting offspring must be as enduring as the race. The demand, therefore, will be as imperative as the necessity, and hence the desire for offspring must be as deep and fundamental as the soul itself.
The law of procreation demands that in view of the great end to be accomplished, those who unite in the procreative art should unite upon the highest and purest plane. Hence the conjugal affection or love has its basis in this deepest and most immutable necessity of the soul. Understand me—man, in his present condition, is the grand ultimate of all past being and action. And that which took all past ages to accomplish is committed to man in the command to be fruitful and multiply. The future is committed to him. That which comes into conscious being must do so through him, and the true foundation for the fulfillment of the great command is laid in the conjugal union of the male and female souls. To say of the impulse calling for such union, that it demands change and consequent variety, is blasphemously false and absurd. The basis of conjugal love is as deep and immutable as are the foundations of immortality and eternal life.
But let this union be a mere external and lustful one, that is, one looking for self-gratification, and it becomes subject to the law of lust, and consequently, like every other lustful affection, will demand variety. The very nature of lust is to disease and destroy and to defeat the end sought. It therefore brings with itself ultimate cloying and disgust; and to remedy that, it must have change.
That this is the nature of that impulse which free lovers mistake for love, is further evident from its associations. The plea they set up is, that every one is free to seek happiness; and consequently when one relation or pursuit fails to conduce to that end, they should be permitted to change the relation or the pursuit, and seek happiness in another. They make the seeking after happiness the great end of life; hence they have adopted very appropriate language, such as "passional attraction," "passional affinity," etc.
For this reason, in their assemblies they aim at self-gratification. Each is striving to beget pleasure. Their assembly-rooms are full of amusements and “innocent recreations,” singing, dancing, playing at different games, chatting, etc., all pursued in respect to the pleasures they promise, and not in respect to the good irrespective of the pleasure. The plea is, the people demand cheap amusements, or rather need them. Cheap amusements are the very things they ought not to have. It is but another name for cheap dissipation. But the advocate for free love complains that the law and public sentiment hold him to his choice, when he has made a bad one. The uses and benefits of the law are seen in this, that they do hold all such to their choice, and by so doing avoid a multiplicity of bad matches.
The individual who is out seeking passional affinities is under the influence of lust, and the sooner he or she is caught and caged the better; such can gain nothing by being permitted to experiment. Until they can rise above their selfish and lustful natures in other things, they will not be very likely to do it in matrimonial affairs.
END.