Old Father Christmas.

Are you a doctor?

Doctor.

Yes, I am a doctor—a doctor of good fame. I have travelled through Europe, Asia, Africa, and America, and by long practice and experience I have learned the best of cures for most disorders instant (incident?) to the human body; find nothing difficult in restoring a limb, or mortification, or an arm being cut off by a sword, or a head being struck off by a cannon-ball, if application have not been delayed till it is too late.

Old Father Christmas.

You are the very man, I plainly see,
That can restore my poor old wife to me.
Pray tell me thy lowest fee.

Doctor.

A hundred guineas, I'll have to restore thy wife,
'Tis no wonder that you could not bring the dead to life.

Old Father Christmas.

That's a large sum of money for a dead wife!