A SINCERE FRIEND
A FACETIOUS COMPANION
AND AN EXCELLENT COMEDIAN," etc.
Hogarth is said to have engraved a ticket for his benefit on April 25, 1717, when he played Sir Joseph Wittol in Congreve's "Old Batchelor."
All jokes marked with an asterisk are in the first edition, but the book has been somewhat expurgated.
"Joe Miller going with a friend one day along Fleet Street, and seeing old Cross the Player, who was very deaf, and unwilling that any one should know it, on the other side of the way, told his friend he should see some Sport; so beckoning Cross with his finger, and stretching open his mouth as wide as ever he could, as if he halloed to him, though he said nothing; the old fellow came puffing from the other side of the way. What a pox do you make such a noise for, do you think one can't hear?
* "Joe Miller another day sitting in the window at the Sun tavern in Clare Street, while a fish woman was passing by, crying, Buy my soul—buy my maids! Ah! you wicked creature, said Joe, are you not content to sell your own soul, but you must sell your maid's also.
"A person of quality coming into a church where several of his ancestors lay buried, after he had praised them very much for worthy men, Well, said he, I am resolved, if I live, to be buried as near them as possible.
"One man told another who used not to be clothed very often, that his new coat was too long for him; That's true answered the other, but it will be longer before I get another.
* "A poor man who had a termagant wife, after a very long dispute, in which she was resolved to have the last word, told her, if she spoke another crooked word more he would beat her brains out: Why then, Ram's Horns, you dog, said she if I die for it.