Hope. Yes, verily, but it would come into my mind again, and then I should be as bad, nay, worse than I was before.
Chris. Why, what was it that brought your sins to mind again?
Hope. Many things; as,
1. If I did but meet a good man in the streets; or,
2. If I have heard any read in the Bible; or,
3. If mine head did begin to ache; or,
4. If I were told that some of my neighbors
were sick; or,
5. If I heard the bell toll for some that were
dead; or,
6. If I thought of dying myself; or,
7. If I heard that sudden death happened to
others;
8. But especially when I thought of myself that
I must quickly come to judgment.
Chris. And could you at any time with ease get off the guilt of sin, when by any of these ways it came upon you?
Hope. No, not I; for then they got faster hold of my conscience; and then, if I did but think of going back to sin (though my mind was turned against it,) it would be double torment to me.
Chris. And how did you do then?
Hope. I thought I must endeavor to mend my life; for else, thought I, I am sure to be lost forever.
Chris. And did you endeavor to mend?
Hope. Yes, and fled from not only my sins, but sinful company too, and betook me to religious duties, as praying, reading, weeping for sin, speaking truth to my neighbors, etc. These things did I, with many others, too much here to tell.