But yet, do not think that by the subjection I have here mentioned, that I do intend women should be their husbands' slaves. Women are their husbands' yokefellows, their flesh and their bones; and he is not a man that hateth his own flesh, or that is bitter against it (Eph 5:29). Wherefore, let every man 'love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband' (Eph 5:33). The wife is master next her husband, and is to rule all in his absence; 13 yea, in his presence she is to guide the house, to bring up the children, provided she so do it, as the adversary have no occasion to speak reproachfully (1 Tim 5:10, 13). 'Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. A gracious woman retaineth honour:' and guideth her affairs with discretion (Prov 31:10; 11:16; 12:4).
Object.
But my husband is an unbeliever; what shall I do?
Answer.
If so, then what I have said before lieth upon thee with an engagement so much the stronger. For, 1. Thy husband being in this condition, he will be watchful to take thy slips and infirmities, to throw them as dirt in the face of God and thy Saviour. 2. He will be apt to make the worst of every one of thy words, carriages, and gestures. 3. And all this doth tend to the possessing his heart with more hardness, prejudice, and opposition to his own salvation; wherefore, as Peter saith, 'ye wives, be in subjection to your husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they may also without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; while they behold your chaste conversation, coupled with fear' (1 Peter 3:1, 2). Thy husband's salvation or damnation lieth much in thy deportment and behaviour before him; wherefore, if there be in thee any fear of God, or love to thy husband, seek, by a carriage full of meekness, modesty, and holiness, and a humble behaviour before him, to win him to the love of his own salvation; and by thus doing, how 'knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband?' (1 Cor 7:16).
Object.
But my husband is not only an unbeliever, but one very froward, peevish, and testy, yea, so froward, &c., that I know not how to speak to him, or behave myself before him.
Answer.
Indeed there are some wives in great slavery by reason of their ungodly husbands; and as such should be pitied, and prayed for; so they should be so much the more watchful and circumspect in all their ways.
1. Therefore be thou very faithful to him in all the things of this life.