CHAR. But did you tell them of your own sorrow, and fear of destruction? for I suppose that destruction was visible enough to you.
CHR. Yes, over, and over, and over. They might also see my fears in my countenance, in my tears, and also in my trembling under the apprehension of the judgment that did hang over our heads; but all was not sufficient to prevail with them to come with me.
CHAR. But what could they say for themselves, why they came not?
CHR. Why, my wife was afraid of losing this world, and my children were given to the foolish delights of youth; so what by one thing, and what by another, they left me to wander in this manner alone.
CHAR. But did you not, with your vain life, damp all that you by words used by way of persuasion to bring them away with you?[72]
CHR. Indeed, I cannot commend my life; for I am conscious to myself of many failings therein; I know also, that a man by his conversation may soon overthrow, what by argument or persuasion he doth labour to fasten upon others for their good. Yet this I can say, I was very wary of giving them occasion, by any unseemly action, to make them averse to going on pilgrimage.[73] Yea, for this very thing, they would tell me I was too precise, and that I denied myself of things, for their sakes, in which they saw no evil. Nay, I think I may say, that if what they saw in me did hinder them, it was my great tenderness in sinning against God, or of doing any wrong to my neighbour.
CHAR. Indeed Cain hated his brother, "because his own works were evil, and his brother's righteous" (1 John 3:12); and if thy wife and children have been offended with thee for this, they thereby show themselves to be implacable to good, and "thou hast delivered thy soul from their blood" (Ezek. 3:19).
Now I saw in my dream, that thus they sat talking together until supper was ready.[74] So when they had made ready, they sat down to meat. Now the table was furnished "with fat things, and with wine that was well refined": and all their talk at the table was about the Lord of the hill; as, namely, about what He had done, and wherefore He did what He did, and why He had builded that house. And by what they said, I perceived that He had been a great warrior, and had fought with and slain "him that had the power of death," but not without great danger to Himself, which made me love Him the more[75] (Heb. 2:14, 15).
For, as they said, and as I believe (said Christian), He did it with the loss of much blood; but that which put glory of grace into all He did, was, that He did it out of pure love to His country. And besides, there were some of them of the household that said they had been and spoke with Him since He did die on the cross; and they have attested that they had it from His own lips, that He is such a lover of poor pilgrims, that the like is not to be found from the east to the west.
They, moreover, gave an instance of what they affirmed, and that was, He had stripped Himself of His glory, that He might do this for the poor; and that they heard Him say and affirm, "that He would not dwell in the mountain of Zion alone." They said, moreover, that He had made many pilgrims princes, though by nature they were beggars born, and their original had been the dunghill (1 Sam. 2:8; Psa. 113:7).