In making arrangements for our departure Adam disclosed to me for the first time that he was affected with oedematous swellings in some parts of the body to such a degree as to preclude the slightest attempt at marching and, upon my expressing my surprise at his having hitherto concealed from me the extent of his malady, among other explanations the details of the preceding story came out. It now became necessary to abandon the original intention of proceeding with the whole party towards Fort Providence and, Peltier and Samandré having volunteered to remain with Adam, I determined on setting out with Benoit and Augustus, intending to send them relief by the first party of Indians we should meet. My clothes were so much torn as to be quite inadequate to screen me from the wind and Peltier and Samandré, fearing that I might suffer on the journey in consequence, kindly exchanged with me parts of their dress, desiring me to send them skins in return by the Indians. Having patched up three pairs of snowshoes and singed a quantity of skin for the journey we started on the morning of the 20th. Previous to my departure I packed up the journals of the officers, the charts, and some other documents, together with a letter addressed to the Under-Secretary of State detailing the occurrences of the Expedition up to this period, which package was given in charge to Peltier and Samandré with directions that it should be brought away by the Indians who might come to them. I also instructed them to send succour immediately on its arrival to our companions in the rear, which they solemnly promised to do, and I left a letter for my friends, Richardson and Hood, to be sent at the same time. I thought it necessary to admonish Peltier, Samandré, and Adam to eat two meals every day in order to keep up their strength, which they promised me they would do. No language that I can use could adequately describe the parting scene. I shall only say there was far more calmness and resignation to the Divine will evince by everyone than could have been expected. We were all cheered by the hope that the Indians would be found by the one party and relief sent to the other. Those who remained entreated us to make all the haste we could and expressed their hope of seeing the Indians in ten or twelve days.
At first starting we were so feeble as scarcely to be able to move forwards and the descent of the bank of the river through the deep snow was a severe labour. When we came upon the ice where the snow was less deep we got on better, but after walking six hours we had only gained four miles and were then compelled by fatigue to encamp on the borders of Round-Rock Lake. Augustus tried for fish here but without success so that our fare was skin and tea. Composing ourselves to rest we lay close to each other for warmth. We found the night bitterly cold and the wind pierced through our famished frames.
The next morning was mild and pleasant for travelling and we set out after breakfast. We had not however gone many yards before I had the misfortune to break my snowshoes by falling between two rocks. This accident prevented me from keeping pace with Benoit and Augustus and in the attempt I became quite exhausted. Feeling convinced that their being delayed on my account might prove of fatal consequence to the rest I resolved on returning to the house and letting them proceed alone in search of the Indians. I therefore halted them only whilst I wrote a note to Mr. Back, stating the reason of my return, and desiring he would send meat from Reindeer Lake by these men if St. Germain should kill any animals there. If Benoit should miss Mr. Back I directed him to proceed to Fort Providence and furnished him with a letter to the gentleman in charge of it, requesting that immediate supplies might be sent to us.
On my return to the house I found Samandré very dispirited and too weak, as he said, to render any assistance to Peltier, upon whom the whole labour of getting wood and collecting the means of subsistence would have devolved. Conscious too that his strength would have been unequal to these tasks they had determined upon taking only one meal each day, so that I felt my going back particularly fortunate as I hoped to stimulate Samandré to exertion and at any rate could contribute some help to Peltier. I undertook the office of cooking and insisted they should eat twice a day whenever food could be procured but, as I was too weak to pound the bones, Peltier agreed to do that in addition to his more fatiguing task of getting wood. We had a violent snow-storm all the next day and this gloomy weather increased the depression of spirits under which Adam and Samandré were labouring. Neither of them would quit their beds and they scarcely ceased from shedding tears all day; in vain did Peltier and myself endeavour to cheer them. We had even to use much entreaty before they would take the meals we had prepared for them. Our situation was indeed distressing but in comparison with that of our friends in the rear we thought it happy. Their condition gave us unceasing solicitude and was the principal subject of our conversation.
Though the weather was stormy on the 26th Samandré assisted me to gather tripe de roche. Adam, who was very ill and could not now be prevailed upon to eat this weed, subsisted principally on bones, though he also partook of the soup. The tripe de roche had hitherto afforded us our chief support, and we naturally felt great uneasiness at the prospect of being deprived of it by its being so frozen as to render it impossible for us to gather it.
We perceived our strength decline every day and every exertion began to be irksome; when we were once seated the greatest effort was necessary in order to rise, and we had frequently to lift each other from our seats, but even in this pitiable condition we conversed cheerfully, being sanguine as to the speedy arrival of the Indians. We calculated indeed that if they should be near the situation where they had remained last winter our men would have reached them by this day. Having expended all the wood which we could procure from our present dwelling, without danger of its fall, Peltier began this day to pull down the partitions of the adjoining houses. Though these were only distant about twenty yards yet the increase of labour in carrying the wood fatigued him so much that by the evening he was exhausted. On the next day his weakness was such, especially in the arms of which he chiefly complained, that he with difficulty lifted the hatchet; still he persevered whilst Samandré and I assisted him in bringing in the wood, but our united strength could only collect sufficient to replenish the fire four times in the course of the day. As the insides of our mouths had become sore from eating the bone-soup we relinquished the use of it and now boiled the skin, which mode of dressing we found more palatable than frying it, as we had hitherto done.
On the 29th Peltier felt his pains more severe and could only cut a few pieces of wood. Samandré, who was still almost as weak, relieved him a little time and I aided them in carrying in the wood. We endeavoured to pick some tripe de roche, but in vain, as it was entirely frozen. In turning up the snow, in searching for bones, I found several pieces of bark which proved a valuable acquisition as we were almost destitute of dry wood proper for kindling the fire. We saw a herd of reindeer sporting on the river about half a mile from the house; they remained there a long time but none of the party felt themselves strong enough to go after them, nor was there one of us who could have fired a gun without resting it.
MURDER OF MR. HOOD. DEATH OF SEVERAL OF THE CANADIANS.
Whilst we were seated round the fire this evening, discoursing about the anticipated relief, the conversation was suddenly interrupted by Peltier’s exclaiming with joy “Ah! le monde!” imagining that he heard the Indians in the other room; immediately afterwards to his bitter disappointment Dr. Richardson and Hepburn entered, each carrying his bundle. Peltier however soon recovered himself enough to express his delight at their safe arrival and his regret that their companions were not with them. When I saw them alone my own mind was instantly filled with apprehensions respecting my friend Hood and our other companions, which were immediately confirmed by the Doctor’s melancholy communication that Mr. Hood and Michel were dead. Perrault and Fontano had neither reached the tent nor been heard of by them. This intelligence produced a melancholy despondency in the minds of my party and on that account the particulars were deferred until another opportunity. We were all shocked at beholding the emaciated countenances of the Doctor and Hepburn as they strongly evidenced their extremely debilitated state. The alteration in our appearance was equally distressing to them for since the swellings had subsided we were little more than skin and bone. The Doctor particularly remarked the sepulchral tone of our voices which he requested us to make more cheerful if possible, unconscious that his own partook of the same key.
Hepburn, having shot a partridge which was brought to the house, the Doctor tore out the feathers and, having held it to the fire a few minutes, divided it into six portions. I and my three companions ravenously devoured our shares as it was the first morsel of flesh any of us had tasted for thirty-one days, unless indeed the small gristly particles which we found occasionally adhering to the pounded bones may be termed flesh. Our spirits were revived by this small supply and the Doctor endeavoured to raise them still higher by the prospect of Hepburn’s being able to kill a deer next day, as they had seen and even fired at several near the house. He endeavoured too to rouse us into some attention to the comfort of our apartment, and particularly to roll up in the day our blankets which (expressly for the convenience of Adam and Samandré) we had been in the habit of leaving by the fire where we lay on them. The Doctor having brought his prayer-book and testament, some prayers and psalms and portions of scripture appropriate to our situation were read and we retired to bed.