[Original]

ETER,—that wor th' name'at this stooan mason had been kursened,—agreed to spend th' rest o' th' afternooin an' neet wi us, an' show us what he could. Aw had'nt forgetten seein th' monument at th' time awd had a dust wi th' Frenchman, an' soa aw propooased we should goa thear furst, an' we did—at th' furst seet it reminded me o' th' monument o' London, but it proved to be summat far hansomer, for it wor th' Vendome column. Awd read abaat it befoor an' knew all abaat th' silly lumpheeads'at spent days o' labor to pool it daan, as if bi destroyin that they could blot aght th' memory o' th' man it wor raised to honor; whearas if it wor possible to sweep ivvery stick an stooan'at forms ther splendid city, off th' face o' th' eearth, an' leeav nowt but a barran tract o' land in its place, noa pilgrim wanderin ovver it but what wod find his thowts circlin raand th' memory ov Napoleon. All honour to them, who while strivin to wrest an empire from his successor's grasp, raised once agean this monument to his fame.

It ud be wearisome if awd to attempt to describe all th' grand buildings, statys, faantens an' churches'at we passed—Peter wor ivvedently at hooam, an' could show us moor i' hauf a day nor we should ha seen in a wick—Just a passing word abaat one an' then awl leeav writin abaat what yo can read abaat i' scoors o' books beside this, an' give an idea or two abaat things'at other writers awther havnt seen or darnt tell. La Madaleine,—that's th' name ov a church—but it does'nt luk a bit like a church, its far moor like St. George's Hall at Liverpool, but ther's summat far grander abaat it. It wor oppen free, an' we went in. Inside it lukt as Billy sed, 'far moor like a gurt cungerin show nor a church,' but ther wor noa mistak abaat its beauty. Ther wor a gooid lot o' fowk in, mooastly strangers like ussen, but here an' thear wor one'at seemed to have moor serious business on hand. Unless ther's moor virtue in a candle nor aw think ther is, ther's a fearful waste o' wax gooas on i' that spot, for ther wor scoors burnin, net to give leet, that awm certain.—Peter sed it wor a custom wi em to burn a lot o' candles after th' deeath o' onybody, soa as to leet ther soul into th' next world,—aw dooant think it does ony harm, an' if it satisfies em, its as weel to say nowt abaat it, but when my time comes aw hooap ther'll be a breeter way to show me th' rooad nor what them candles seemed to give. Although they let yo in for nowt, yo'd hard wark to get aght withaat payin summat, but we did manage it, an' felt better suited wi ussen,—net'at we wor too meean to pairt wi a copper or two for th' seet wor worth it, but becoss we did'nt agree wi th' principle on it.

Another wonder worth mentionin, is th' New Grand Opera House, but altho' it did cost a million paands sterlin it ud be as mich as mi heead wor worth, if awd to say at it wor owt fit to be compared wi th' New Grand Opera house they've built i' Leeds, becoss ther nivver wor sich a place as that, accordin to all accaants, an' if th' architect should ivver 'shuffle off this mortal coil,' aw hooap they'll put him in a bottle, an' set him up ith' Philosophical Museum as a new curiosity, for ther's nivver been owt fresh put in sin aw wor a lad, an' that's a year or two sin—th' last time aw wor thear aw thowt th' mumny lukt fair looansome. It's a pity at th' Grand Opera Haase i' Payris doesnt pay, but what it falls short, th' government maks up, an' its to be hooaped'at if th' Leeds "Grand" does'nt pay'at th' Corporation'll suppooart it aght o' th' rates—for awm gien to understand at it wor nivver built wi th' idea o' makkin a profit aght on it, but nobbut to elevate th' public taste, tho' they tak gooid care'at yo get noa taste 0' th' elevation unless yo pay to go in. When aw read th' Leeds Mercury, (aw allusread all th' theatrical news i' their paper,) an' saw all they had to say abaat it, it reminded me ov a chap aw knew'at lived at Halifax, an' when ivver ony friend called to see him, he used to delight i' marchin em abaat th' taan to show em th' wonders, (an' ther is some wonders i' Halifax, ther's noa denyin that;—an' to me th' biggest wonder ov all is at th' taan's thear at all,) but he allusfinished off wi takkin em daan bi th' old church to have a luk at Beacon Hill—"Nah then," he'd say, "what does ta think abaat that for a hill? Th' sun has his wark to get ovver that i' daycent time in a mornin tha can bet!" An' if th' chap he's showin it too should happen to say'at 'he'd seen hills ten times as big,' he'd shak his heead an' say—"Awve heeard fowk tawk like that befoor; but it's th' biggest hill awve ivver seen, an' it'll be time enuff for me to believe ther's a bigger when aw find one; but inasmich as he's nivver been monny yards away throo hooam he believes'at Beacon hill is th' biggest hill yet."

Peter propooased nah at we should have a carriage as it ud help us to see a varry deeal moor nor we should be able to do, if we depended o' shanks gallowy, soa we agreed, an' wor sooin seeated be-hund a pair o' spankin greys—"Cannot yo drive us to some brewery?" sed Billy, "aw mak nowt o' com-min here unless aw can leearn summat."

"There are breweries here, plenty of them, but not the class you want to see, they call them Brasseries, but they are in reality places for drinking beer, and not for making it."

"Well, neer heed, lets goa, for aw should feel shamed o' misen if awd to goa back hooam withaat leearnin summat abaat th' trade, an' when awm called on at th' next annywel vitlers dinner, to mak a speech, it'll nooan mak a bad start to say 'th' last time'at aw wor i' Payris &c.,' an' it'll mak some on em oppen ther een'at fancies coss a chap lives at th' moor end'at he's foorced to be a fooil. Aw wor allusov an enquirin turn o' mind Mr. Peter, an' ther's Sammy thear, he luks as big a cauf heead as yo'll meet wi in a day's march, but them at taks him for a fooil mak a mistak, aw should nooan ha browt him wi me on a journey like this if aw had'nt thowt summat abaat him."

"Aw did'nt know'at tha had browt me," aw sed, "it wor me'at axd thee to coom if aw ammot mich mistakken.",

"Awm nooan baan to fratch abaat it mun, if tha says a thing tha'll stick to it aw know that, an' if ther's ony credit tha'll awther have it or swelt—but aw wonder whear tha'd ha been if it had'nt been for me—tha'd ha been lockt up for riteous conduct ith' street Mr. Peter knows that; by th' heart! but this is a queer lukkin neighborhooid yo're takken us into—Aw dooant like th' luk o' some o' theas fowk—aw nivver saw sich a cutthroit lukkin lot i' mi life! Awm nooan soa varry particular abaat gooin to see th' breweries; if yo think ther's ony danger, let's goa back;—net at it matters for me for awm a single chap, but Sammy's left a wife at hooam an' its her awm thinkin on."