It isn't often at ther's soa mich brass faand inside a Clock Almanack, but ther's monny an monny a paands worth ov innocent amusement to be faand in its pages, an they're odd kind o' fowk at connot thoil to spend a threepeny bit on one, or think ther brass is wasted.
Sammywell's Reformation.
"Mally! If tha cannot scale th' foir baght makkin that din, let it alooan!"
"When aw want thee to tell me ha to scale a foir aw'll ax thi! Aw should think aw've lived long enuff to know that mich. It mun awther be scaled or it'll goa aght."
"Then let it goa aght! If tha maks a racket like that agean tha'll goa aght whativver comes o'th foir, or if tha doesn't aw'll pitch thi on th' top on it! Oh my poor heead! aw wish tha had it for hawf an haar, then tha'd know summat."
"Awm nooan soa sewer abaat that! Tha's had it ivver sin aw knew thi an its varry little at tha knows!"
"Aw know it'll drive me aght o' mi senses if it doesn't stop."
"Well, tha willn't have far to goa, that's one blessin. Bless mi life! its nobbut a touch o'th tooithwark."
"Nobbut a touch isn't it? If tha'd to be touched i'th same way tha wodn't live five minnits. As it happens, it isn't th' tooithwark at all, it's th' newralgy aw've getten into mi heead."