MRS. MAJOR (shrugging her shoulders). Pshaw! they could only laugh at your absurd suspicions!
MAJOR. Suspicions? Come, I like that, when I have the proofs—you hear, madam, the proofs of your misconduct!—this letter, madam! this letter! (producing letter and flourishing it).
MRS. P. A letter!
MAJOR. Yes! listen, and shudder! (taking letter out of envelope, which he lets fall on stage, then reading in an impressive tone). “Star of my life, idol of my heart!” That’s pretty well to begin with! (Reading again.) “Ever since the God of Love first presented you to my enraptured orbs!” (Aside.) What does the fellow mean by “orbs?” (Reading again.) “I have loved you”—point of admiration; here it is, there’s no mistake about the point of admiration! (showing letter to MRS. P. and DOCTOR). But that’s not all! (Reads again.) “In order to bask in your divine presence, I am prepared to sweep every obstacle from my path.” There’s a sanguinary ruffian! Of course I’m one of the obstacles to be swept away!
MRS. P. And how is the letter signed?
MAJOR. There is no signature!
FANNY (aside). That’s fortunate! (picking up the envelope unseen and putting it in her pocket).
MAJOR (to MRS. MAJOR). Now, madam, what have you to say?
MRS. MAJOR. Simply this, that I am more than ever indignant at your preposterous and odious suspicions.
FANNY (suddenly confronting MAJOR). So am I! You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Jeremiah! and so ought you, mamma, and so ought everybody! And what’s more, I’m determined that poor, dear, innocent Georgina shall be no longer unjustly accused!