"They got upon the first offset all serene; but when they footed it on the third, down they came, and humpty-dumpty was not in it with the show. It was a flat procession and a general lay-out, and such a rubbing of mid-backs occurred as few have seen before. They fell soft, though, as we had partly finished backing up the bridge. I was nearly had; but I had a bit in hand with which to squeeze home at the finish, and get in the first words. They were:—
"'Gentlemen, I had no time to warn you, but the mortar has not had time to set all round, it is green; and where it has set, it is that powerful it often shifts the stones first, and then clenches them tight, and there is no parting them at all; they become gripped together just as by nature in the quarry. It is wonderful material, and the best lime known, or that I have had to do with during thirty years of hard working experience."
"Of course, the directors could say nothing; they were bankers and solicitors, or such-like, nor could the engineers. It did not do to make out the masonry had not been properly executed. I thought I had got off beautifully, and the whole party were just going to start when out of the blessed wall, there and then, flew two pheasants!"
"Well, I never!"
"You wait. Yes; and before we could speak, out came a fox. I own I was nearly beaten, but one of the directors, turning to us, said, 'You appear to have a veritable Noah's ark here, and we know a pheasant is a gallinaceous bird.'
"We all laughed. He then went on to say, 'Perhaps if we wait long enough the procession will continue. This may be the ancestral home of the dodo or the mastodon. Who can say it is not?' They again laughed.
"Now, you know, there is no denying, neither a pheasant nor a fox can squeeze themselves through an ordinary-sized mortar joint. While laughing I got my mind right, and said, 'Gentlemen, I feel sure the poachers have been on the prowl here, and have disturbed the work.'
"'Yes,' said the director. The others seemed afraid to speak. There is always a cock in every farmyard, and he was in this. 'A four-legged poacher—the fox; and I am afraid, if we do not exercise due care, the board will be charged with larceny.'
"Then we all thought we ought to laugh, and did. 'Gentlemen,' I said, 'I'm sure the bridge has been tampered with, and no doubt if we keep watch we shall find the rascals.'
"Excuse me now saying 'rascals' to you, but, old chum, of course between ourselves, that is you and me, we have never done any poaching."