A pamphlet was published about the same time, under the same title as this plate. In Banks's Poems, vol. I. p. 87. the print is copied as a head-piece to an Epistle to Mr. Hogarth, on this performance. In a note, it is said to have appeared after The Harlot's Progress; and that in the original, and all the larger copies, on the papers that hang out of the politician's pocket at the end of the table, was written The Craftsman, and The London Journal.
Of this print a good, but contracted copy, was published (perhaps with Hogarth's permission), and the following copy of verses engraved under it.
The Bacchanalians; or a Midnight Modern Conversation. A Poem addressed to the Ingenious Mr. Hogarth.Sacred to thee, permit this lay
Thy labour, Hogarth, to display!
Patron and theme in one to be!
'Tis great, but not too great for thee;
For thee, the Poet's constant friend,
Whose vein of humour knows no end.
This verse which, honest to thy fame,
Has added to thy praise thy name!
Who can be dull when to his eyes
Such various scenes of humour rise?
Now we behold in what unite
The Priest, the Beau, the Cit, the Bite;
Where Law and Physick join the Sword,
And Justice deigns to crown the board:
How Midnight Modern Conversations
Mingle all faculties and stations!
Full to the sight, and next the bowl,
Sits the physician of the soul;
No loftier themes his thought pursues
Than Punch, good Company, and Dues:
Easy and careless what may fall,
He hears, consents, and fills to all;
Proving it plainly by his face
That cassocks are no signs of grace.
Near him a son of Belial see;
(That Heav'n and Satan should agree!)
Warm'd and wound up to proper height
He vows to still maintain the fight,
The brave surviving Priest assails,
And fairly damns the first that fails;
Fills up a bumper to the Best
In Christendom, for that's his taste:
The parson simpers at the jest,
And puts it forward to the rest.
What hand but thine so well could draw
A formal Barrister at Law?
Fitzherbert, Littleton, and Coke,
Are all united in his look.
His spacious wig conceals his ears,
Yet the dull plodding beast appears.
His muscles seem exact to fit
Much noise, much pride, and not much wit.
Who then is he with solemn phiz,
Upon his elbows pois'd with ease?
Freely to speak the Muse is loth—
Justice or knave—he may be both—
Justice or knave—'tis much the same:
To boast of crimes, or tell the shame,
Of raking talk or reformation,
'Tis all good Modern Conversation.
What mighty Machiavel art thou,
With patriot cares upon thy brow?
Alas, that punch should have the fate
To drown the pilot of the state!
That while both sides thy pocket holds,
Nor D'Anvers grieves, nor Osborne scolds,
Thou sink'st the business of the nation
In Midnight Modern Conversation!
The Tradesman tells with wat'ry eyes
How Credit sinks, how Taxes rise;
At Parliaments and Great Men pets,
Counts all his losses and his debts.
The puny Fop, mankind's disgrace,
The ladies' jest and looking-glass;
This he-she thing the mode pursues,
And drinks in order—till he sp—s.
See where the Relict of the Wars,
Deep mark'd with honorary scars,
A mightier foe has caus'd to yield
Than ever Marlbro' met in field!
See prostrate on the earth he lies;
And learn, ye soldiers, to be wise.
Flush'd with the fumes of gen'rous wine
The Doctor's face begins to shine:
With eyes half clos'd, in stamm'ring strain,
He speaks the praise of rich champaign.
'Tis dull in verse, what from thy hand
Might even a Cato's smile command.
Th' expiring snuffs, the bottles broke,
And the full bowl at four o'clock.
March 22, 1742, was acted at Covent-Garden, a new scene, called A Modern Midnight Conversation, taken from Hogarth's celebrated print; in which was introduced, Hippisley's Drunken Man, with a comic tale of what really passed between himself and his old aunt, at her house on Mendip-Hills, in Somersetshire. For Mr. Hippisley's benefit.
[1] These, in my first edition, I had ventured, on popular report, to say were parson Ford, and the first Lord Northington, when young. But I am now enabled to identify their persons, on the authority of Sir John Hawkins: "When the Midnight Modern Conversation came out, the general opinion was, that the Divine was the portrait of Orator Henley; and the Lawyer of Kettleby, a vociferous bar orator, remarkable, though an utter barrister, for wearing a full-bottom'd wig, which he is here drawn with, as also for a horrible squint."
In that once popular satire, The Causidicade, are the following lines on this lawyer:
"Up Kettleby starts with a horrible stare!
'Behold, my good Lord, your old friend at the bar,
Or rather old foe, for foes we have been,
As treason fell out, and poor traitors fell in.
Strong opposites e'er, and not once of a side,
Attornies will always great counsel divide.
You for persecutions, I always against,
How oft with a joke 'gainst your law have I fenc'd?
How oft in your pleadings I've pick'd out a hole,
Thro' which from your pounces my culprit I've stole;
I've puzzled against you now eight years or nine,
You, my Lord, for your King, I a ——l for mine.
But what is all this? Now your Lordship will say,
To get at the office this is not the way.
I own it is not, so I make no request
For myself, still firm to my party and test:
But if 'tis your pleasure to give it my son,
He shall take off his coif t'accept of the boon;
That coif I, refusing, transferr'd upon him,
For who'd be a serjeant where P——r was Prime?
That my son is a lawyer no one can gainsay,
As witness his getting off W——te t'other day.'
Quo' my Lord, 'My friend Abel, I needs must allow
You have puzzled me oft, as indeed you do now;
Nay, have puzzled yourself, the court and the law,
And chuckled most wittily over a flaw;
For your nostrums, enigmas, conundrums, and puns,
Are above comprehension, save that of your son's.
To fling off the coif! Oh fye, my friend Abel,
'Twould be acting the part of the Cock in the Fable!
'Tis a badge of distinction! and some people buy it;
Can you doubt on't, when Skinner and Hayward enjoy it?
Tho' I own you have spoil'd (but I will not enlarge on't)
A good Chancery draftsman to make a bad Serjeant.'"
Lord Northington did not come into notice till many years after the publication of this print.