Sir Geo. Yes, you dragged me out by the ear, like a waterdog—last week, 'cause you found the tenth bottle uncorked, you rushed in among my friends, and ran away with me; and, next morning Captain O'Shanaghan sends me a challenge for quitting the company, when he was in the chair! so, to save me from a headach, you'd like to've got my brains blown out.
John. Oh, very well; be burnt in your bed, and tumble in the water, by jumping into boats, like a tight fellow as you are, and poison yourself with sloe juice; see if John cares a piece of mouldy biscuit about it. But I wish you hadn't made me your valet de shamber. No sooner was I got on shore, after five years dashing among rocks, shoals, and breakers, than you sets me on a high-trotting cart horse, which knockt me up and down like an old bomb-boat in the Bay of Biscay, and here's nothing to drink after all! Because at home you keep open house, you think every body else does the same.
Sir Geo. Why, by sailing into this strange port, we may be more free than welcome.
John. Holla! I'll never cease piping, 'till it calls up a drop to wet my whistle. [Exit.
Sir Geo. Yes, (as John Dory remarks) I fear my trip through life will be attended with heavy squalls and foul weather. When my conduct to poor Amelia comes athwart my mind, it's a hurricane for that day, and turn in at night, the ballad of "Margaret and William," rings in my ear. [Sings.] "In glided Margaret's grimly ghost." Oh, zounds! the dismals are coming upon me, and can't get a cheering glass to—holloa!
Enter Ephraim Smooth.
Eph. Friend, what would'st thou have?
Sir Geo. Grog.
Eph. Neither man nor woman of that name abideth here.
Sir Geo. Ha, ha, ha! man and woman! then if you'll bring me Mr. Brandy and Mrs. Water, we'll couple them, and the first child probably will be Master Grog.