"When I gets back to the theater I sees a green buzz-wagon at the stage door with a guy 'n' a shofe in it.
"The chicken has hold of my arm comin' out of the door, but she lets go of it 'n' then steps up straight to the buzz-wagon.
"'I can't keep my engagement with you this evening,' she says. 'My brother's in town and I'm going to be with him.'
"'Bring your brother along,' says the guy, 'n' I know by that he's got it bad.
"'I can't very well,' she says. 'We have some family matters to talk over. I'll see you some other evening.'
"The very next night a bunch of scenery tumbles over. The race is goin' on, 'n' Edwin Booth is layin' down to it right. A piece of scenery either falls under his feet or else jims the machine, I never knows which, anyhow, all of a sudden the hoss gets real footin'. Bingo! We're on our way like we're shot out of a gun. We go through all the scenery on that side 'n' Edwin Booth does a flop when he hits the brick wall at the end of the stage. The ole hound ain't even scratched. I ain't hurt neither.
"The curtain rings down 'n' De Mott comes a-lopin' to where I'm gettin' a painted grand-stand off of Edwin Booth's front legs.
"'In heaven's name what were you trying to do?' he says.
"'I was just practisin' one of them quick exits you're always talkin' about,' I says.
"'All right,' he says. 'Keep on practising till you come to that door! Follow on down the street till you reach the river and then jump in!'