Rog. Yes, by my troth, have I;
But if Roger were to be hang'd up for't,
Look you now, he cou'd not hold laughing:
What I have in my Mind, out it comes: But bar that;
I'se on honest Lad as well as another.
Esop. My time's dearer to me than yours, Friend; have you any thing to say to me?
Rog. Gadswookers, do People use to ask for Folks when they have nothing to say to 'em: I'se tell you my Business.
Esop. Let's hear it.
Rog. I have, as you see, a little Wit.
Esop. True.
Rog. I live in a Village hard by, and I'se the best Man in it, tho' I say it that should not say it. I have good Drink in my Cellar, and good Corn in my Barn: I have Cows and Oxen, Hogs and Sheep, Cocks and Hens, and Geese and Turkeys: But the Truth will out, and so let it out. I'se e'en tired of being call'd plain Roger. I has a Leathern Purse, and in that Purse there's many a fair Half-crown, with the King's sweet Face upon it, God bless him; and with his Money, I have a mind to bind myself 'Prentice to a Courtier: 'Tis a good Trade, as I have heard say; there's Money stirring: Let a Lad be but diligent, and do what he's bid, he shall be let into the Secret, and share Part of the Profits; I have not lived to these Years for nothing: Those that will swim must go into deep water: I'se get our Wife Joan to be the Queen's Chamber-maid; and then——Crack, says me I; and forget all my Acquaintance. But to come to the Business. You who are the King's great Favourite, I desire you'd be pleas'd to sell me some of your Friendship, that I may get a Court-Place. Come, you shall chuse me one yourself; you look like a shrewd Man; by the Mass, you do.
Esop. I chuse thee a Place!
Rog. Yes, I wou'd willingly have it such a sort of a Place, as wou'd cost little, and bring in a great deal; in a Word, much Profit, and nothing to do.
Esop. But you must name what Post you think wou'd suit your Humour.