Gent. Now I do believe I am beginning to be a wise Man; for I never till now perceived I was a Fool. But do you then really believe, Sir, our Men in Business do the best they can?
Esop. Many of 'em do: Some perhaps do not. But this you may depend upon; he that is out of Business is the worst Judge in the World of him that is in: First, Because he seldom knows any Thing of the Matter: And, Secondly, Because he always desires to get his Place.
Gent. And so, Sir, you turn the Tables upon the Plaintiff, and lay the Fool and Knave at his Door.
Esop. If I do him wrong, I'm sorry for't. Let him examine himself, he'll find whether I do or not.
[Exit Esop.
Gent.——Examine!—--I think I have had enough of that already. There's nothing left, that I know of, but to give Sentence: And truly I think, there's no great difficulty in that. A very pretty Fellow I am, indeed! Here am I come bellowing and roaring two hundred Miles Post to find myself an Ass; when, with one Quarter of an Hour's Consideration, I might have made the self-same Discovery, without going over my Threshold. Well! if ever they send me on their Errand to reform the State again, I'll be damn'd. But this I'll do: I'll go home and reform my Family if I can: Them I'm sure I know. There's my Father's a peevish old Coxcomb: There's my Uncle's a drunken old Sot: There's my Brother's a cowardly Bully: Son Numps is a lubberly Whelp: I've a great ramping Daughter, that stares like a Heifer: and a Wife that's a slatternly Sow.
[Exit.
Enter a young, gay, airy Beau, who stands smiling contemptibly upon Esop.
Esop. Well, Sir, what are you?
Beau. A Fool.