Friday 18. I was tempted to set my heart on our garden. But I cried for help and was delivered. I hope to use both this, and every thing else, with a single eye to the glory of God. Blessed be God, I have solid, settled peace; and find my heart enlarged, to promote his glory as far as lies in my power. May he assist me, and keep me to the end!
Saturday 19. Glory be to God, I see and feel my own weakness more and more. My soul is greatly drawn out after God, for a larger measure of grace. O may I be throughly
“Willing to receive,
What thy goodness waits to give!”
Tuesday 22. This has been a day of trial, even from my nearest friend. But, glory be to God, I have been kept in peace; though without Christ I cannot stand a moment. I long to be nearer Christ, and to have a more awful sense of God’s presence in my [♦]worldly business. Lord, take away the spirit of forgetfulness from me, and let me set thee always before me.
[♦] “wordly” replaced with “worldly”
Friday 25. I was waked this morning by the cries of my little child, who was very ill. I asked the maid to get up, and light the fire. She was unwilling, and spoke quick. I answered quick, “I wonder you can lie by the child, and hear him cry so.” Immediately I felt a danger of anger, and stopped short, glory be to God.
Saturday 26. I kept my bed most part of the day, and was likewise heavy in spirit, and had hardly any power to pray. But in the evening I was greatly comforted, in thinking how glorious the change would be, when this mortal would put on immortality, and death be swallowed up in victory.
Monday 28. My little boy continued exceeding ill: I was quite resigned concerning him, only desiring it might please God, to ease his pain, either by life or by death. But I want more patience: I want a more feeling sense of the sufferings of our Lord, which he endured for me, though he knew no sin. And shall I, who deserve hell, complain of any thing?
Saturday November 2. My child being very unruly, I had a struggle to avoid anger in correcting her. May the Lord enable me, to keep my watch every moment; otherwise I cannot but fall.