Wednesday 18. I was tempted this morning to resentment: but, glory be to God, it could not enter. Lord, search me and prove me, empty me of myself and fill me all with God. For ever wash, and keep me clean, and let Christ be all in all.
Wednesday 25. I found indifference about going to church. I begged of the Lord to direct me, and immediately the reasonings disappeared. In the afternoon I poured out my soul before him, and prayed till I could scarce speak. I long for a closer communion with God, and for more wisdom and understanding in his ways.
Tuesday, July 8. Glory be to God, I am still the monument of his free mercy. Amidst a world of business and hurry, I still enjoy peace, and commune with God, as a man with his friend. I have not so much joy as in time past; but my faith is strong, and I enjoy a calm peace. And when temptation comes as a flood, his spirit lifts up a standard against it. Meeting in band at night, I was quite stript, and felt my nothingness. Glory be to God, that I am out of hell, because his compassions fail not.
*Tuesday 22. Glory be to God, I am still assured that the Lord has given me a clean heart, and renewed a right spirit within me; and I can have no doubt of it, though I am not so overflowed with joy in the means of grace as I have been. But I have a calmness and power which I never had in so great degree, in the midst of the closest trials. Only I am grieved for sinners, and pray that the Lord would pluck them as brands out of the burning.
Friday 25. This evening I have been at the interment of an acquaintance. What nothings we are, and how soon turned to our mother earth? Should not this thought cause us to live in love and peace with all men? And to live as expecting the messenger of death every moment?
Saturday, August 2. I have been for several days much disordered in body. In my illness I had hardly power to pray, or to do any thing. O may I prize health more, and make full use of it, when the Lord sends it. Glory be to God, I had no fear of death, and no anxious care for my children. I only wanted more power to praise God. And will he not give that and all things? O cleanse me from my secret faults! And let no sin ever more prevail over me!
*Wednesday 6. Blessed be thy name, I do not find any thing within to close with temptations. Yesterday anger presented as quick as thought; but it found no entrance. Yet shame covered me, for fear any that were present might discern the appearance of it. And I begged the Lord to shew me, if there was any evil root left? As far as I know myself, I do not find there is: I do firmly believe, he hath purified me from all sin. But I am big with the desire of living nearer God: O how dear was he to me this night? Thou art altogether lovely: thou art fairer than the sons of men.
Thursday 14. Glory be to God, there has been a cry in my dear mother’s soul all this day. Lord, increase it! Thou hast set her sins in array before her. May she never rest till she rests in thee!
Friday 22. I went three or four miles this evening to the preaching: My mind was solemnly stayed on God; but I was not very lively: my husband being talking most of the way about worldly affairs. O Lord, direct him in all his ways, and let nothing hurt his precious soul.
Saturday 30. I have been much disordered in body all this day; but, glory be to God, have enjoyed calmness of spirit. Yet I have been grieved to see some of my family, so busy about the world, and so little concerned for their poor souls, but trifling away their precious moments. Lord, let me redeem the time! Let me never rest in any thing I have attained: but still press on, till I know all that love of God that passeth knowledge!