Memoir and Diary of John Yeardley, Minister of the Gospel

by John Yeardley

CHAPTER XXI.

LAST JOURNEY AND DEATH, 1858.--CONCLUDING REMARKS.

We are now arrived at the closing scene of John Yeardley's labors. The impression which he had received, during his visit to Turkey in 1853, of the opening for the work of the Gospel in the Eastern countries, had never been obliterated; it had rather grown deeper with time, although his ability to accomplish such an undertaking had proportionately diminished. This consideration, however, could not satisfy his awakened sympathies, and, according to his apprehension, no other course remained for him but to prepare for a visit to the missionary stations in Asia Minor and the countries beyond, in order to deliver to the inquiring inhabitants amongst whom those stations are planted, the message of Christ's love to their souls with which he believed himself to be charged. And when he communicated to his friends the apprehension that this journey was required of him as the last offering of thanksgiving before his day closed, they were satisfied to "lay their hands upon him" for the work, thinking, perhaps, that the veteran soldier could not better end his campaign than with his arms in his hands, actively contending for the faith. That such might not improbably be the issue of the enterprise, John Yeardley himself believed; but it is doubtful if he correctly estimated the arduous nature of the journey. It would have been a bold undertaking in the vigor of his days: at his time of life, and with his declining strength, it was, humanly speaking, impossible that he should accomplish nearly all he had in view.

His Diary unfolds his spiritual exercises and his natural feelings in the prospect before him.

3 mo. 17.--The last two months have been to me an awful time of deep conflict of spirit, arising out of a prospect of a religious visit to some places in Asiatic Turkey, and parts adjacent. I do not know when I have had more conflict to arrive at a clear pointing. I prayed earnestly and waited long for that clear pointing of Divine Wisdom, without which I can never move in concerns of this importance. In the end, I am thankful to say, the cloud was removed and the sun stone with brightness, and no longer was my poor tried mind left in doubt as to the line of religions duty; and before mentioning it to any one, I communicated it to the Monthly Meeting in the Second Month. Much unity and sympathy were expressed, and the certificate ordered. It is now signed, and is a sweet document, short and explicit.

I see and deeply feel the perils and sufferings which await me, in venturing on untrodden ground, as it regards any minister of our Society, and to such a distance, and among, for the most part, an unbelieving people. But I can and do look forward in calm confidence, trusting, as I have ever done, in the aid and protecting care of my Heavenly Father, whose cause I desire to serve, and whose will I wish above all other things to do. My earthly career can never end better than in the work of my Divine Master; and should it be his will to terminate my life in the Arab tent, I shall have more consolation there than in an English home under the stinging sense of a dereliction of my religious duty.

I am giving all my leisure hours to learn something of the Turkish language, for travelling purposes, and for a little social intercourse. Ever since this concern fastened on my mind, it has been connected with having the company of my young friend from the South of France, Jules Paradon.

May the Lord grant me resignation, faith, grace, and strength to do his holy will; and then, whether it end in life or death, his great name shall be praised. This testimony I record in gratitude and love to the mercy of my God. Amen.

Before leaving England, he paid a visit to Staines.

4 mo. 20.--I went down to Staines, and spent two weeks with Margaret Pope, which sojourn proved a strength and comfort to me. This dear friend is a succorer of many, and, I can truly say, of me in particular. We had several pleasant drives, and made friendly visits to the neighboring meetings and Friends. I also applied pretty diligently to the Turkish language.