In the absence of senior officers, we were some time under the command of a young man, who was newly promoted to the rank of major. He had the elements of a good commanding officer in him, and in his discipline endeavoured to copy Colonel Lloyd; but the nervous manly spirit was wanting—the perfect self-confidence in his own powers and judgment, which the original possessed. Vacillating and infirm of purpose, he was alternately led by some officer or another; and although he disliked the one whose portrait I have given in the preceding page, yet he had not resolution enough to oppose the measures which he carried by dint of impudence. Thus his efforts to imitate Colonel Lloyd were often rendered farcical. For instance, in endeavouring to establish the cleanliness and regularity of messing, which the corps was so remarkable for, while under the command of Colonel Lloyd, the men were encouraged to provide extra dishes, on the anniversaries of any of our battles, which, in addition to the whisky purchased for the occasion, took away a good deal of their pay, as these red-letter days occurred very frequently. The consequence was, that the men were getting so much the epicure, in a small way, that they would willingly have held anniversaries on every day of the year, had it not been that as the lining inside increased, the covering of the outside was getting thinner. This, however, soon wrought its own cure. But after all, Major C—— was a warm-hearted, feeling gentleman; all he wanted, was experience, and a little more knowledge of human nature. I have no doubt but by this time he is an excellent officer.
He was succeeded by one whom I need not name, we all knew him well enough. The first time I remember him in command of the regiment, he was superintending a punishment, which he ordered to be given by tap of drum. As he paced up and down the square, listening to the cries of the poor wretch, with a countenance, in which the green and yellow were striving for predominance, with the dark tinge which it had naturally—‘he grinned horribly a ghastly smile,’ which I think I see before me at this instant, in all its native deformity; but we were not much troubled with his company during the fighting days. I have ransacked my memory, endeavouring to find some good action he had done while in the corps, to throw into the scale against the rest of his conduct; but I am obliged to give up the task in despair.
It may be asked, was there no bright reverse to oppose to this picture? Yes there was,—Captain G——, witty, intelligent, and good humoured, with his face reflecting all the good qualities of his heart; Captain D—— C——, the kind and benevolent, who still cherishes his kindly feeling to the old corps, and has done more for the individuals who belonged to it than any man in the regiment; Captain K——, a gentleman of refined manners and education; Captains C——, B——, and A——; and last, though not least, a man who ought to have been a major a dozen years ago—he had been in India with the corps, and commanded the light company through the Peninsula; but he is still a captain, although many must have passed over his head in the course of two-and-twenty years. Though rather unpolished in his manners, he was a good officer—not very eloquent; however, the speech he made to his company, previous to their being engaged for the first time in Portugal, will long be remembered:—
‘The French are before you, my lads—let us fight manfully: if we live we’ll be an honour to our country, and if we die,’ (lowering his voice,) ‘it’s no great consequence.’
Some may be inclined to think, from my warmth on the subject of flogging, and the freedom with which I have treated the character of officers, that I may myself have smarted under the lash; or at least that I feel envious and disappointed at not being promoted in the service. When I first set out in my narrative, I resolved to keep myself in the back ground; and I might have closed my story without telling the public farther than what they now know, were it not that my statements might suffer from surmises similar to that I have mentioned; but for the sake of truth, and in justice to myself and the service, I think it necessary to state, that I did not long remain a private. I entered the service at fourteen years of age, was corporal before I was sixteen, and by the time I attained my eighteenth year, I had risen to that rank which few men who enlist as private soldiers can ever hope to pass in the British army. During my service, I have held situations that required something more than ordinary ability and steadiness, and I possess testimonials of character from my various commanding officers that I have every reason to be proud of.
If I have spoken freely of the abuse of power in the army, I have done it through a natural hatred to oppression and tyranny, which every thinking man must feel; and as a subject of a free and enlightened country, I claim a right to speak my sentiments. I have no prejudice against the aristocracy of the army—far from it—there are many of them whom I esteem and respect—many of them intelligent and liberal-minded men, who would do honour to any profession; but there are also others of a different stamp, supercilious, overbearing tyrants, who think their fellow-men created to be their slaves, and ignorant, swaggering coxcombs, whose puppyism must disgust all under their command. I have spoken of them as they merited,—let each claim his meed of praise or censure as he may think himself deserving it.
I believe few people set out in life with higher notions of rank or greatness than I did. The reading I indulged tended to increase it,—even the favourite tragedy[20] which we were in the habit of reciting on Saturday in school, taught me that there was something in noble blood that shone in the countenance, and inflamed the heart, though the possessor were born in a shed, and bred among beggars—some impress that marked the refined gold of creation. This was imposing in theory, and finely calculated for the ideal world I then lived in; but when I entered upon the stage of the great world, and had an opportunity of seeing those favoured individuals, I felt as much disappointment as the poor woman, who ran half-a-dozen miles to see the king, and after all discovered that he was only a man. The result was, that I learned to look on gold lace and epaulettes without being dazzled, and in forming my opinion of the individual, to go a little deeper than his splendid outside. The haughty contempt or insolence of a superior, and the cringing sycophancy of understrappers, many of whom were ready to hunt down on the slightest hint any poor devil who had the misfortune to incur the displeasure of his officer, gave me the keenest mortification; but it threw me on my own energies, and taught me to exist within myself, independent of the smiles or frowns of those around me: although my body was constrained, my soul was free—and I could detest a tyrant, and despise a blockhead, whatever his rank might be.
Let it not be thought, however, that I dislike men, because they stand above me in the scale of society—far from it. Where they are good men, I respect and esteem them the more, that they are so in spite of the power and temptation they have to be the contrary. I have invariably found, that the real gentleman is mild and unassuming in his manners, and possesses more feeling for his fellow-creatures, than those who start into rank or wealth.
FOOTNOTES:
[20] ‘Douglas,’ which I admire for its composition and dramatic effect; but detest for the venal sentiments which it is calculated to convey.