Existentially speaking, man is his choices. This does not mean that a man can be anything he chooses. Naturally, each individual is unique, having his own particular potentials and limitations. Nor is this view a denial of the forces of unconscious motivation and habit. It does not imply that all of a person's actions result from totally conscious deliberations. By saying, "I am my choices," I mean I am this here and now person because in my past life I took particular paths in preference to others; of the possibilities open to me, I actualized certain ones.
In this sense, I am my history, I am what I am, what I have become. But I am also what I am not, what I have not become. I am a nurse, this unique here and now nurse with particular experience, knowledge, skills, and values; without other experience, knowledge, skills, and values. Through self-reflection I know that I have changed, I have experienced growth from within. I know myself as a being capable of becoming more, capable of actualizing my possibilities, my self. So I am my choices not only in terms of my past but also in regard to my future, my possibilities.
Man is an individual being necessarily related to other men in time and space. As every man is beholden to other men for his birth and development, interdependence is inherent in the human situation. In this sense, human existence is coexistence. The deeper significance of this truth has been recognized and elucidated by many thinkers, especially those in the existential stream. Over {16} and over, their writings reveal the paradoxical tension of being human: each man is, at once, independent, a unique individual and interdependent, a necessarily related being. As Wilfrid Desan says, referring to man as subsistent relation, "He is towards-the-other but he is not-the-other."[1]
Furthermore, as Martin Buber and Gabriel Marcel maintain, it is actually through his relations with other men that a man becomes, that his unique individuality is actualized. To know myself as "individual" is to experience myself as this particular unique here-and-now person and other than that there-and-now person. Or in other words, to know myself as me is to see myself in relation to and distant from other selves. As Buber so beautifully states, "It is from one man to another that the heavenly bread of self-being is passed."[2]
Logically, it follows that the possibility for self-confirmation exists in any intersubjective situation. However, in everyday life this self-confirmation is experienced to different degrees or on different levels in interhuman relating. Since both persons are independent subjects acting with their human capacity for disclosing or enclosing themselves, there is no guarantee that the availability and presence necessary for a genuine confirming encounter will come forth. Presence, the gift of one's self, cannot be seized or called forth by demand, it can only be given freely and be invoked or evoked.
Since man becomes more through his choices and the aim of nursing is to help man toward well-being or more-being, the humanistic nursing effort is directed toward increasing the possibilities of making responsible choices. Such choice involves, in the first place, an openness to and an awareness of one's own situation. A choice is a response to possibility. Therefore, one must first recognize that possibilities or alternatives exist. This openness to options is experienced as a freedom to choose as well as a freedom from the bonds of habit and stereotyped response, from routine, from the veils of the obvious. It means getting in touch with one's experience, one's subjective-objective world. As one becomes more acutely aware of his personal freedom of choice, there arises concurrently an awareness of the quality of choice, of the responsibility that is always implied in the freedom. Then follows reflective consideration of one's unique situation with its possible alternatives and an examination of the values inherent in them. Finally, the act of choosing is expressed in a response to the situation with a willingness to accept the responsibility for its foreseeable consequences. Through this experience the person becomes aware of himself as an individual. As a subject choosing freely and responsibly, he knows himself as distinct from and yet related to others.
Nursing, being an intersubjective transaction, presents an occasion for both persons, patient and nurse, to experience the process of making responsible choices. Through living this process in nursing situations, the nurse develops her own potential for responsible choosing. The satisfaction, often in the form {17} of a sense of vitality and strength, that is felt in making responsible competent professional judgments reinforces the habit. In personally coming to experientially appreciate the growth promoting character of responsible choosing, the nurse may more readily recognize the value of such experiences for any person, including the one currently labeled "patient." The humanistic nurse, therefore, is alert to opportunities for the patient to exercise his freedom of choice within the limits of safe and sound practice. She is constantly assessing his capabilities and needs and encourages his maximum participation in his own health care program. Through coexperiencing and supporting the process in the patient's experience from his point of view, the nurse nurtures his human potential for responsible choosing. Both patient and nurse become more through making responsible choices in the intersubjective, transactional nursing situation.
Theory and Practice
The term "humanistic nursing" refers to a kind of nursing practice and its theoretical foundations. The two are so interrelated that it is difficult, in fact even somewhat distorting, to speak exclusively of either the practice or the theory of humanistic nursing. When, for the sake of clarity or emphasis, discussion is focused on either the practical or the theoretical realm, thoughts of the other realm cast their shadows on the fringes. For in our view, for the process of nursing to be truly humanistic means that the nurse is involved as an experiencing, valuing, reflecting, conceptualizing human person. From the other side, the theory of humanistic nursing is derived from actual practice, that is, from being with and doing with the patient. "Theory," says R. D. Laing, "is the articulated vision of experience."[3]
Humanistic nursing is not a matter solely of doing but also of being. The humanistic nurse is open to the reality of the situation in the existential sense. She is available with her total being in the nurse-patient situation. This involves a living out of the nurturing, intersubjective transaction with all of one's human capacities which include a response to the experienced reality. Man is able to set his world at a distance as an independent opposite and enter into relation with it. In fact, according to Buber, this is what distinguishes existence as human. It is man's special way of being.[4] For nursing to be humanistic in this full sense of the term requires being and doing in the situation and subsequently setting the experienced reality at a distance (that is, objectifying it) and entering into relation with it. The nurse's reflective response to her lived world may take the shape of any form of human dialogue with reality, such as, science, art, or philosophy.