“But,” Conseil asked, “haven’t certain famous pearls been quoted at extremely high prices?”
“Yes, my boy. They say Julius Caesar gave Servilia a pearl worth 120,000 francs in our currency.”
“I’ve even heard stories,” the Canadian said, “about some lady in ancient times who drank pearls in vinegar.”
“Cleopatra,” Conseil shot back.
“It must have tasted pretty bad,” Ned Land added.
“Abominable, Ned my friend,” Conseil replied. “But when a little glass of vinegar is worth 1,500,000 francs, its taste is a small price to pay.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t marry the gal,” the Canadian said, throwing up his hands with an air of discouragement.
“Ned Land married to Cleopatra?” Conseil exclaimed.
“But I was all set to tie the knot, Conseil,” the Canadian replied in all seriousness, “and it wasn’t my fault the whole business fell through. I even bought a pearl necklace for my fiancée, Kate Tender, but she married somebody else instead. Well, that necklace cost me only $1.50, but you can absolutely trust me on this, professor, its pearls were so big, they wouldn’t have gone through that strainer with twenty holes.”
“My gallant Ned,” I replied, laughing, “those were artificial pearls, ordinary glass beads whose insides were coated with Essence of Orient.”