How thankful she was that she had not spoken to him angrily in their last talk! How she wished that she had said just one kind word to him at parting! True, he had given her no opportunity; but if she had known—
Suddenly she burst into violent weeping, and in this condition they found her, with the telegram on the floor at her feet.
“Who would have thought my lady would have taken it so hard?” said Mrs. Parlett, when the exciting news was heard down-stairs. “They was that ’aughty to one another before people! But it’s them as feels the most, sometimes.”
This remark was addressed to Nora, in the hope of eliciting a response, but Nora excelled in the art of holding her tongue.
It was she alone who was admitted to her mistress’s apartments, where Bettina remained, in deep agitation, while the preparations for the arrival of Lord Hurdly’s body were being made. After her profound emotion of pity for him, her next thought had been of Horace. He was the heir and nearest of kin. It flashed upon her, with the suddenness of surprise, that he was Lord Hurdly now.
How strange, how absolutely bewildering, this new state of things seemed! Her mind seemed unable to grasp the strangeness of these new conditions.
Bettina saw no one but the rector of the parish. All that had to be done was so plain and simple, and there were so many capable hands to do it, that there was little need to consult with her. She begged the rector to act in her stead in giving all necessary directions. It was with a deep sense of relief that she reflected on the impossibility of Horace’s arrival in time for the funeral. Perhaps she could get away somewhere before he came.
Those days when her husband’s body lay in the apartment near her, and the relations and friends assembled to do it an honor which in his lifetime they were scarcely suffered to express, marked the period of the real awakening of Bettina’s soul. The sense of freedom which her position now secured to her, the power to do and be what she chose, was like wings to her spirit, and for the first time in her experience the woman and the hour were met.
When she had been free before to make her own life, her vision had been so limited, her aspiration so low, her interest in the heart-beats of the great humanity of which her little life was so small a part had been so uncomprehending, that she had cared only for the narrow issues which concerned herself. But now, in the hour which saw her free again, she was another woman, and this woman had a passionate purpose in her heart to make herself avail for the needs of others.
She resolved that the moment her affairs were settled her new life should begin. The period of her marriage had opened up before her vast opportunities, of which she was eager to take advantage. These would need money for their carrying out, but that she would have money enough she had never doubted. Of course until the reading of the will it would not be known what provision had been made for her, but Lord Hurdly had always been extremely generous as to money, and she had no misgivings on that score.