If Mr. George was not duly impressed by my fashionable mourning, I could (young as I was) trace the effect of Aunt Theresa’s care for my appearance on other friends in the regiment. They openly remarked on it, and did not scruple to do so in my hearing. Callers from the neighbourhood patronized me also. Pretty ladies in fashionably pitched bonnets smiled, and said, “One of your little ones, Mrs. Buller? What a pretty little thing!” and duly sympathized over the sad story which Aunt Theresa seemed almost to enjoy relating. Sometimes it was agony to me to hear the oft-repeated tale of my parents’ death, and then again I enjoyed a sort of gloomy importance which gave me satisfaction. I even rehearsed such scenes in my mind when I was in bed, shedding real tears as (in the person of Aunt Theresa) I related the sad circumstances of my own grief to an imaginary acquaintance; and then, with dry eyes, prolonging the “fancy” with compliments and consolations of the most flattering nature. I always took care to fancy some circumstances that led to my being in my best dress on the occasion.
Gentleman company did not haunt my new home as was the case with the Indian one. But now and then officers of the regiment called on Mrs. Buller, and would say, “Is that poor Vandaleur’s child? Dear me! Very interesting little thing;” and speculate in my hearing on the possibility of my growing up like my mother.
“’Pon my soul, she is like her!” said one of the “middle ones” one day, examining me through his eyeglass, “Th’ same expressive eyes, you know, and just that graceful gracious little manner poor Mrs. Vandaleur had. By Jove, it was a shocking thing! She was an uncommonly pretty woman.”
“You never saw her mother, my good fellow,” said one of the “old ones” who was present. “She had a graceful gracious manner, if you like, and Mrs. Vandaleur was not to be named in the same day with her. Mrs. Vandaleur knew how to dress, I grant you——”
“You may go and play, Margery dear,” said Aunt Theresa, with kindly delicacy.
The “old one” had lowered his voice, but still I could hear what he said, as Mrs. Buller saw.
When my father was not spoken of, my feelings were very little hurt. On this occasion my mind was engaged simply with the question whether I did or did not inherit my mother’s graces. I ran to a little looking-glass in the nursery and examined my eyes; but when I tried to make them “expressive,” I either frowned so unpleasantly, or stared so absurdly, that I could not flatter myself on the point.
The girls were out; I had nothing to do; the nursery was empty. I walked about, shaking out my skirts, and thinking of my gracious and graceful manner. I felt a pardonable curiosity to see this for myself, and, remembering the big glass in Aunt Theresa’s room, I stole out to see if I could make use of it unobserved. But the gentlemen had gone, and I feared that Mrs. Buller might come up-stairs. In a few minutes, however, the door-bell rang, and I heard the sound of a visitor being ushered into the drawing-room.
I seized the chance, and ran to Aunt Theresa’s room.
The mirror was “full length,” and no one could see me better than I now saw myself. Once more I attempted to make expressive eyes, but the result was not favourable to vanity. Then I drew back to the door, and, advancing upon the mirror with mincing steps, I threw all the grace and graciousness of which I was conscious into my manner, and holding out my hand, said, in a “company voice,” “Charmed to see you, I’m sure!”