"She is going to be married! She is going to be married!"
It would seem that he must have forgotten his previous half knowledge of the fact. It would seem to have remained, as at the first hearing, a great and appalling shock—thunderous out of a blue sky.
Below in the open his feet led him mechanically straight down under the trees, through the tangle of shrubbery beyond, and so to the wall under the cedar. Arrived there he awoke all at once to his task, and with a sort of frowning anger shook off the dream which enveloped him. His eyes sharpened and grew keen and eager. He said—
"The last arrow! God send it reached home!" And so went in under the lilac shrubs.
He was there longer than usual: unhampered now he may have made a larger search, but when at last he emerged Ste. Marie's hands were over his face, and his feet dragged slowly like an old man's feet.
Without knowing that he had stirred he found himself some distance away, standing still beside a chestnut tree. A great wave of depression and fear and hopelessness swept him, and he shivered under it. He had an instant's wild panic, and mad, desperate thoughts surged upon him. He saw utter failure confronting him. He saw himself as helpless as a little child, his feeble efforts already spent for naught, and, like a little child, he was afraid. He would have rushed at that grim encircling wall and fought his way up and over it, but even as the impulse raced to his feet the momentary madness left him and he turned away. He could not do a dishonourable thing even for all he held dearest.
He walked on in the direction which lay before him, but he took no heed of where he went; and Mlle. Coira O'Hara spoke to him twice before he heard or saw her.
CHAPTER XXV
COIRA GOES OVER TO THE ENEMY
They were near the east end of the rond point, in a space where fir trees stood and the ground underfoot was covered with dry needles.