The conversation now became fairly lively, and when the Englishman asked to see the ship's papers I very willingly got out my whole collection of smoke-blackened documents. He pawed them over repeatedly, but I noticed at the first glance that he had no earthly idea of the meaning of the documents. He handed me a book to sign. I wrote myself down in several places as 'Niels Larsen, captain of the Norwegian steamer Aud, with pit-props and piece goods from Christiania, for Cardiff and Genoa.' At the mention of pit-props he remarked cheerfully that this cargo was badly wanted in England, and in confirmation of this statement he emptied his glass at a gulp. Without 'by your leave' he at once poured himself out another glass, and assured me again and again that the coffee which I drank was very bad for the nerves. Referring to the Norwegian newspapers lying in front of us, which were now three weeks old, I asked him if he could let me have a few English papers, as I was anxious to know the latest war news. He got up at once, went up on deck, and going over to the side shouted an order to the men on his ship to send over immediately all the papers lying in his cabin.
The conversation now turned on the events of the war, with the result that I found myself in the peculiar position of having to join with one of my deadly enemies in cursing my beloved Germany, which nearly broke my heart. I would have preferred to have knocked the fellow down for some of the ridiculous statements he made. But in view of what I hoped to obtain from him I had to swallow it all and chime in with him. In the meantime my second mate had joined us, accompanied by one of the English petty officers, who carried a huge parcel of the latest papers under his arm. I now went back into the cabin with the petty officer, offered him a whisky, and cast my eye rapidly over the papers. Chance decreed that a paragraph in the second paper I took up caught my eye. It stated that on Wednesday, i.e. two days before our arrival, by order of the English officer commanding the Tralee district, several Sinn Fein leaders had been arrested in Fenit on suspicion of being concerned in a conspiracy against the English Government. So this was the answer to the riddle! And the paper stated that an Irish pilot (whose name I have forgotten) had been arrested on a similar charge. There could be no doubt about it. It must have been our pilot, the man for whom we had been waiting so anxiously here. It was no easy task for me to conceal from the petty officer the difficulty I had in following his remarks on all sorts of unimportant subjects.
Fortunately, the other two now reappeared, and I was able to switch off. I handed the papers to Düsselmann, holding my thumb on the paragraph in question so that he noticed it at once. At the same moment the English captain clapped me on the back, and said in a reassuring tone, 'Capt'n, you need have no fear of U-boats. I'll keep a look-out for you.' As I did not at once grasp the meaning of these words he added in explanation, 'Your mate told me you were very much afraid of the U-boats and feared that you would never return from this voyage. Of course, I can understand this in the case of a man who is engaged to a girl in Christiania and is to be married in two months' time. But don't worry. So long as you are compelled to remain here for repairs I will lie at the entrance to the bay and take care that no U-boat gets in. And now, in return for that, give me another drink.' Suiting the action to the word, he poured out drinks for himself and the petty officer.
I am afraid my face did not give the impression of much intelligence at this moment. Not that I had not understood his words, but I feared that Düsselmann by his well-intended remark had done me more harm than good. If the Englishman really should keep a look-out he might possibly succeed in sinking our submarine, which might still appear at any moment. The more I attempted by all sorts of objectives to dissuade him from his purpose, the more obstinately he clung to this plan. 'Out of gratitude,' as he said. Then he swallowed his glass of whisky in one gulp, while big tears rolled down his maudlin face. It now appeared to me imperative that I should have a few minutes' undisturbed conversation with Düsselmann; so I summoned the first mate and asked him to look after my guests. Making the excuse that I just wanted to have a look round and see that all was well, I left the cabin, which was now almost unbearable for tobacco smoke and the smell of whisky. Düsselmann followed me at once.
We debated what we should do with the fellows. It would have been a simple matter to overpower them and tie them up, for I now learned that the English, who were sitting in the forecastle with my crew, were dead drunk, and that the same was probably true of the men who remained on the Shatter. For Düsselmann had had the inspiration to present four bottles of whisky to the boat's crew. But the execution of this plan would not have helped us, for we had no manner of use for the steamer, and we could not sink her without exciting suspicion. Now, too, when we knew that arrests had already been made in Tralee and that the district was probably under martial law, it would be useless if we manned the Shatter ourselves and ran in to reconnoitre and try to get in touch with the Sinn Feiners. This would cost me at least four men, and I should probably never see them again. We were too much under the observation of the various signalling stations to dismount the Shatter's guns and take them over. And there was no other anchorage in the neighbourhood where we could do it. We therefore came to the conclusion that the best thing to do was to make the fellows dead drunk and then let them go. We dared not stay here later than the next morning. If by that time nothing had happened I intended to try and break through into the Atlantic and start commerce-raiding. In any case I intended during the coming night to send a boat ashore, even at the risk of being discovered. By this time things were getting lively in my cabin. The huge quantity of whisky they had consumed was evoking various discords apparently intended to represent 'It's a Long Way to Tipperary.' And coming from the forecastle also singing, or rather most damnable bawling, could be heard. Well, let them enjoy themselves! We decided we would sound them thoroughly and then get rid of them as quickly as possible.
When I re-entered the cabin the worthy captain held out to me a photograph which he had taken from the wall, asking if that was my fiancée from Christiania. I laughed and said it was. It was a picture of my sister holding her youngest hopeful in her arms! However, I had the satisfaction of knowing that the Englishmen were quite convinced of our Norwegian nationality. They had now got to brandy I noticed. If they continued to mix their drinks in this fashion they would assuredly die of alcoholic poisoning. The captain, although speech had become a matter of some difficulty to him, was getting more and more loquacious. Between his hiccoughs he told us that he was on outpost duty here, but that he made himself quite comfortable all the same. Two hours before dark at the very latest he always proceeded to a quiet anchorage behind Kerry Head in order to be able to sleep in comfort. His crew, too, he added, were all in favour of a good night's sleep! The only privation they suffered was lack of whisky, this being strictly prohibited on British warships. That, he said, was the reason why he was so glad to seize this opportunity and to find so kind a host. I nodded benevolently, and asked him how long he had been stationed here. 'Not very long,' he replied. 'I was sent here a couple of weeks ago from Aberdeen, mainly in order to intercept a German steamer which is expected to arrive here at any moment.'
We of the Aud involuntarily glanced at each other—the business was getting more and more interesting every moment. When I had recovered from my first astonishment I asked a few questions. 'Yes, I suppose you think the Germans don't break through the blockade,' said the captain. 'Well, I assure you they do. Look at the Möwe, for instance. She got back all right.' And in order to wash out the impression which the return of the Möwe made on his English sailor's heart he hastily took a big drink, the whisky trickling down from the corners of his mouth. Then he went on again: 'Look here, I will tell you how it is. You Norwegians are good fellows; so there is no harm in my telling you, although it is really supposed to remain absolutely secret. Well, we, that is to say, the Naval Staff, have discovered that these damned swine, the Germans, want to join the Irish in bringing about a revolution. That is why they chose me in order to capture the auxiliary cruiser which is to come in here and bring arms for the Irish. Look at the harbour and the entire bay—the whole place is bristling with guns! What a fine reception the Germans will get from us. Of course the beggars are clever—but we English are a jolly sight cleverer.'
I could no longer contain myself. I burst out laughing, and the first and second mate joined in. This capped all that we had experienced so far! Fortunately, the Englishman thought we were laughing at the stupidity of the Germans, for he repeated again and again, 'Yes, they are terribly stupid, in spite of all their cunning!' I now knew all I wanted to know. I rushed to the locker, and telling this splendid, clever Englishman that I wished him the very best of luck on his quest, I got out another half-dozen bottles of whisky and a box of cigars, which I presented to him and his brave crew as a token of my respect. He himself was incapable of carrying the bottles, so we stuffed them in his pockets and those of his petty officer, telling the gentlemen that we must now get to work and must beg them to leave the ship. And they, with a loving look at their presents, declared their readiness to go. As he was getting up the captain beckoned to me, and, with his hand to my ear, hiccoughed, 'If by any chance you catch sight of the German cruiser out there be careful that she does not sink you. Inform a signalling station at once, or one of our many cruisers which are waiting in the offing for her. You will be well rewarded by the Government. I tell you that as a—friend!' I laughed, and promised to do so, and then pushed the two of them out. I stood upon no ceremony in dismissing the horribly drunken pair. The rest I left to my crew, and in about ten minutes Düsselmann was able to report to me that all the English, dead drunk, had left the ship, and that Shatter II. was steering a zigzag course for the mouth of the bay. Later we found out that he kept his word and kept watch for us against submarines at a distance of five miles. Poor unsuspecting fool!
The first thing I did then was to sit down in the cabin in order to regain my breath, cool down, and collect my thoughts. We had entertained our guests for two solid hours! If I had been told that in six weeks the world would come to an end I might have believed it. But if any man had told me that in my own cabin the captain of an English outpost boat would warn me against myself I should have thought him mad. What we had just gone through was so incredibly funny that I might have thought it a dream if the statement of the Shatter captain had not reminded us of the seriousness of our position. And very serious it was.