It sometimes happens that a child brought up under these circumstances finds himself, in adult life, placed amidst other scenes. He immediately sees the difference and compares his training to those around him. If he is ambitious and wants to change his mode of life, he has to commence all over again his work of imitation. He has reason with him now to help him, yet he will at first find it uphill work; but when he succeeds, he will be the much better man. Should a child when he reaches adult age care not to pluck these traits from his character, he becomes at once a rude, dangerous member to society and a grievance to those with whom he comes in contact.
Too much care cannot be taken in teaching the children the avoidance of sham. This must especially be insisted on in the matter of dress. Most all of us are fond of “fine raiment,” and we cannot help but feel that appearances play an important part in life. It must be the avoidance of imitating of finery and the adoption of the substantial in dress, that we must teach our children.
GLITTERING IMITATIONS A SERIOUS EVIL
In the matter of dress, girls are more influenced by its grandeur than are boys, and the wise mother will do well to teach her daughter simplicity in everything. Never allow her to wear imitations of precious stones or jewelry. This is not only bad taste, but it is a bad habit to form. Many a poor girl has fallen from grace just through the love of glittering baubles. Teach her never to rouge her cheeks or use cosmetics. If Nature has not given her a perfect complexion, she can never get it by imitation. “You can’t cheat Nature,” but you can aid it. Have her imitate God’s creatures by copying cleanliness, simple eating and regular habits. She may not get a faultless complexion—few people have this gift—but she can get that soft texture of skin, that buoyancy of spirit, that brightness of eye with the soul showing through. Let these be her models and the imitation will be of real worth.
GUIDANCE IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION
While the imitation of dress and the lighter vanities of life are more indulged in by the girl, the boy also is a decided imitator in other weaknesses. A boy will imitate any quality which he thinks manly. Would that the points they imitate deserved this name, but most of the things they copy are those which will sooner or later, make slaves of them. How early we see the tiny tot of three or four years placing a piece of stick or anything which resembles a cigar, between his lips. Watch him puff at it; see him imitate the strut of a man. This sometimes appears comical, and the child is often prevailed upon to show how clever he is. Alas, this is only the first attempt to imitate the manly arts, and if not guided in the right direction his imitations may become a tragedy instead of a comedy.
By imitation of acts the character becomes slowly and imperceptibly, but at length decidedly formed. Do not think, mother, that because your child is young it cannot judge. In this you are greatly mistaken. Children are very clever judges and especially do they see through any inconsistency. They hear you say: “You mustn’t do thus and so.” What do you think is in their childish minds when they discover you doing it? Children do not appreciate the motto which the preacher gave to his congregation: “Do as I say, not as I do.” No, indeed, they follow the example. The precept is forgotten.
The habits, which are our constant companions and followers through life, are based on imitation. If good habits are to be formed, childhood is the time to plant them. You cannot begin too early. The little tot who sees her mother throw down her belongings cannot be expected to take care of her playthings, nor, as she grows up, to be neat and tidy. Order is Heaven’s first law and the successful mother will start with having a place for everything and have everything in its place.
GOOD MANNERS AND SOCIAL ETIQUETTE
The demeanor of a child is also a vast reflector of home training. You cannot always teach morals by imitation, but you can the custom of manners and social etiquette. In the primitive appetites of eating and drinking, imitation is a very strong force. How easily a little child will imitate the smacking of lips after some article of diet especially enjoyed. How easily he comes to use his knife in conveying food to his mouth, if he has seen this performance. How anxious he is to rush from the table as soon as he has finished eating. These, and many other breaches of good manners, I am sorry to say, come as a result of seeing others do likewise.