11. Mahomedan Miracles.—Mahomedans bear off the palm in miraculous prodigies. For instance, a cock is spoken of so large that the distance between its feet and head was five hundred days' journey. What a pity Barnum could not obtain it! Another example: an angel so large that the distance between his eyes was seventy thousand days' journey. The head of this tall ghost must have been among the planets. The earth would have been too small to furnish him with a seat; and the attempt to-use it for that purpose would probably have thrown it out of its orbit.
12. Christian Miracles.—The early Christians seem to have had the whole miracle-making machinery of heaven under their control. Their miracles were prodigious and numerous. They claimed they could cast out devils, call the dead from their graves, and make ghosts walk about either end up. We are told that when a Mr. Huntingdon was reduced to great poverty and suffering, and prayed for divine assistance, fishes came out of the water to him, and larks and leather breeches from heaven, to serve as food and clothing. It is difficult to conceive how leather breeches came to be stored in heaven. With these few specimens, selected at random, we will stop. They are too large even to excite our marvelousness. The most ignorant and superstitious nations have always had the longest creeds and the tallest miracles.
13. We have stated that the only evidence of the performance of any miracle in most cases is the simple narration of it by the writer who records it. The Roman Catholics, however, claim to have the testimony of thousands of reliable witnesses to attest to the performance of some extraordinary miracles which they have reported the history of; such as a picture of the Virgin Mary, hanging on the walls of the church, opening and shutting its eyes daily for six or seven months, which they declare was witnessed by sixty thousand people, including Pope, cardinals, bishops, &c.,—leading men of the Church.
14. There is as much evidence that Esculapius raised Hypolitus from the dead (as related by the Roman historian Pausanias), as that Elijah or Christ raised the dead; as much evidence that the serpent's egg inclosed in gold (as related by Pliny in his "Arguinum Ovum") swam up stream when thrown into the river, as that Elisha raised an ax to the surface of the water by casting a stick into it (2 Kings vi. 6); as much evidence that Mahomet opened a fountain of water in the end of his little finger, as that Samson found a spring of water in the jaw-bone of an ass; as much evidence that Mahomet's camel talked to him, as that Balaam's ass was endowed with human speech; and as much evidence that Esculapius cured the blind with spittle, as that Christ performed such cures. All stand upon a level; all lack the proof.
15. Here let it be noted that many of the miracles recorded in the Christian Bible are susceptible of an explanation upon natural principles; such as the shadow going back on the dial of Ahaz, as the phenomenon has been witnessed in some of the Eastern countries of the shadows appearing to recede, when the sun is near the solstice, once in the forenoon and once in the afternoon. The story of the devils entering the hogs may be explained by assuming the devils to have been frogs; for they are described as being like frogs. (See Rev. xvi. 13.)
The resurrection of Lazarus may be explained by assuming him to have been in a state of coma, or trance; for Christ once declared, "This sickness is not unto death," but "he sleepeth" (John xi). The bloody sweat of Christ, and his transfiguration, can also be explained on natural principles; also Paul's conversion, and his miraculous cures with a handkerchief. Dr. Newton, the great healer, has cured hundreds of cases in a similar manner. And the time will come when all real occurrences, now called miracles, will be accounted for, and understood as the operation of natural causes.
CHAPTER XXI.—ERRORS OF THE BIBLE IN FACTS AND FIGURES.
A spiritual or metaphorical interpretation, if allowable in any case, can not avail any thing towards either removing, explaining, or mitigating, in the least degree, the numerous palpable Bible errors represented by figures. "Figures never lie" and admit of no construction. The almost innumerable errors, therefore, of this character which abound in the Bible utterly and for ever prostrate it as a work possessing any authority, reliability, or credibility in matters of history, science, or even theology. Bible writers, when they have occasion to refer to numbers which they are interested in making appear very large, seem to make almost a lawless use of figures. I will present some examples, stated in brief language, commencing with the Pentateuch. The author of these five books, in speaking of the genealogy, population, armies, &c., of his own tribe, makes use of figures which are not only incredible, but utterly impossible. The number of valiant fighting men, for example, among the Israelites, is frequently stated to be about six hundred thousand, and never less. (See Exod. xii. and xxxviii.; Num. xxvi., &c.) This number, as Bishop Colenso demonstrates, reaches far beyond the utmost limits of truth. If the regular army had been six hundred thousand, then the whole population (women and children included) could not have been less than two millions,—a number which many facts, cited by the Bible writer himself, demonstrate to be impossible. I would ask, in the first place, how Moses could address all this immense congregation at once, as he is often represented as doing. (See Ex. xxiv. 3; Lev. xxiv 15; Num. xiv. 7, &c.) Joshua makes "all the congregation" to include women and children. But how could Moses address this vast multitude of people, some of whom must have been at least ten miles distant, unless he used a speaking-trumpet or a telephone, neither of which, however, had then come to light. The writer of Deuteronomy says, "Moses spake unto all Israel" (Deut. i. 1). But not one in a hundred could have heard it, therefore it was very nearly "labor lost." And Joshua says Moses wrote out his commandments, and he read them "before all the congregation of Israel" (Josh. viii. 35). But it would have required a voice as loud as thunder to make "all" of them hear. And it should be borne in mind that the people on these occasions were assembled in the tabernacle,—as we infer from many texts,—a building one hundred and eight yards square, and capable of holding about five thousand people, which would be just one to four thousand of the congregation; so there were five thousand people inside, and one million nine hundred and ninety-five thousand outside. These last, we are told, occupied the outer court, which was just eighteen feet wide.