"It ought, and must, and shall," replied Katherine Hunt. "Go to her for a few minutes, Mollie; I will follow you."
Mollie went out.
"If I told her now that I was going to marry Major Strause, she would get better," thought Mollie.
But although she knew that, she shrank back—she had shrunk back all day. She had felt the sacrifice demanded of her too terrible. Until this morning, although she had not had one particle of regard for the major, still she had thought that in some ways there were a certain bravery, dash, and fineness about him. She had noticed his tender touch with the sick men—his devotion to her service could not but in a measure touch her; but when he unfolded his scheme, he showed her all the blackness of his heart, and Mollie recoiled from the sight.
"Not only to love another man who is white as snow beside him—not only to love that man, but to hate Major Strause as I must hate all wickedness; and then—then, with that knowledge in my heart, to become his wife—it is too monstrous! I cannot do it!" thought the Red Cross nurse.
She reached the hotel, and went up to Kitty's room. Kitty was lying in bed. She looked very white and feeble; there was a curious expression about her—an absence of excitement and also of life. She was all alone in her bedroom. When Mollie entered, she raised her heavy eyelids; she saw Mollie, and uttered a feeble cry.
"I tried to do it," she said, "but I couldn't. I took some, but not enough. I could not go on. Do you think I am poisoned?"
"O my dear Kitty, my dear Kitty! what has happened?" said Mollie.
"I got some laudanum—I stole it from the hospital—and I swallowed some, but not enough. I could repeat the dose, and then it would be all over, but I am frightened. When I took a certain amount I got frightened. I have been very sick, and I thought I was going to die, and—oh, I couldn't do it. I would have made it all right for you if I could have done—it; but I couldn't."
"My dear, dear Kitty, how wicked and dreadful of you! Oh, God was with you to prevent this most terrible thing! But I am not going to scold you now; only you must not be left alone."