"Behold, on yonder eminence, the preacher, with admiring, subscribing crowds about him. 'He is young.' Good! 'How innocent he looks.' Better! 'He has no human learning.' Best of all! 'He knows everything without labour, without study.' Prodigious! See! he spreads his hands, and opens his lips as wide as possible. Hark! Hark! he talks of a sensible new birth! Then, belike, he is in labour, and the good women around him are come to his assistance. He dilates himself,—cries out,—the hill swells into a mountain,—and parturiunt montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Well: he is, at last, delivered; he has felt the new birth; and damns all that have not."
The learned lampooner calls Whitefield "a modern prating youth," "a visionary Anticle, in a gown and cassock;" and proceeds to say:—
"It is quite impossible to be serious with buffoons in religion, and mountebanks in theology; to dispute with a creature, who disclaims sense, and is below argument. He holds forth from the stairs of a wind-mill, and never was exceeded, but by the Knight of de la Mancha flying on the sails of it. He has formed a society of females, who are to confess their love affairs one to another, and to take care there shall be a supply of new Methodists for future generations. He has collected, without letters, patents, license, or protection, larger sums than usually appear upon any gaming table; and, yet, has incurred no penalty by it. If this fund be employed for the purpose given out, the Orphan House is like to exceed all the palaces in Europe. Supposing this humour to go on, I know nothing the growling clergy have to do, but to leave sense and honesty, their little pulpits and less incomes; and to bawl profitable exclamations, with great enlargement, on commons, and get thousands by it. In short, we must put a stop to this sharping trade of the Methodists; or we must all, man, woman, and child, join in the plunder with them."
On August 4, nearly an entire page was used in defending Dr. Trapp, and abusing Whitefield. In reference to Whitefield's exclamation, "O that my head were waters," etc., the writer sneeringly remarks:—
"If his eyes were as full of tears as his heart could wish, what a glorious man he would be to preach a funeral sermon! And if his head were an ocean, he would certainly drown all his congregation, even though he were to preach on Kennington Common."
On August 11, the editor, Mr. Hooker, wrote nearly two pages, in defence of Dr. Stebbing and Dr. Hammond, on the new birth, and, of course, in denouncing Whitefield and his friends:—
"Some Methodists," says he, "have made their boasts that they are become fools for Christ's sake, in which there is something of truth that they do not intend. But, if they think it commendable to be fools for Christ, I hope they will never think it tolerable to be knaves for Him too."
The Weekly Miscellany continued, almost without interruption, these coarse attacks, to the end of 1739; but one added extract must suffice. On December 29, nearly two pages of the newspaper were filled with a violent philippic against Whitefield as a Dissenter. The writer says:—
"Whitefield has been attacked as an enthusiast, and often as a teacher of false and pestilent doctrine; but not often as a Dissenter."