Magistrate: Just see if there are any unlicensed goods underneath—spirits or the like. We had evasions of the salt tax in the Andaman Islands.
Policeman: (Sniffing cautiously and upsetting a heap of apples.) I see no spirits here—or salt.
Magistrate: (To Mrs. Tarpey.) Do you know this town well, my good woman?
Mrs. Tarpey: (Holding out some apples.) A penny the half-dozen, your honour.
Policeman: (Shouting.) The gentleman is asking do you know the town! He’s the new magistrate!
Mrs. Tarpey: (Rising and ducking.) Do I know the town? I do, to be sure.
Magistrate: (Shouting.) What is its chief business?
Mrs. Tarpey: Business, is it? What business would the people here have but to be minding one another’s business?
Magistrate: I mean what trade have they?
Mrs. Tarpey: Not a trade. No trade at all but to be talking.