“Now, at the Duchess of Gordon’s, there were people of the same fashion, and the crowd was just as great; but then she was so lively, and everybody was so animated, and seemed to know so well what they were about—quite another thing.
“As for the Duchess of D.’s, there they were—all that set—all yawning, and wanting the evening to be spent, that they might be getting to the business they were after.”
It may be mentioned that Lady Hester was always very severe on the Duchess of D. and her friends, whenever her name or theirs was mentioned. She said she was full of affected sensibility, but that there was always a great deal of wickedness about her eyes.
The mention of the Duchess of Rutland’s name also led to an amusing anecdote. Lady Hester was speaking of the grand fête given by the duchess when her son came of age. The arrangements were entrusted to a person named Rice, and to some great confectioner. Mr. Rice had been maître d’hôtel, or in some such capacity, in Mr. Pitt’s family.
“Rice told me,” said Lady Hester, “that when he and the other man were preparing for the fête, he never lay down for ten nights, but got what sleep he could in an arm-chair. The duchess gave him three hundred guineas. One day she looked at him over her shoulder; and when one of the beaux about her said, ‘What are you looking after, duchess? You have forgotten something in the drawing-room?’—‘No, no,’ said she, pointing to Rice, ‘I was only thinking that those eyes are too good for a kitchen.’ And then one talked of the eyes, and the eyes, and another of the eyes and the eyes, until poor Rice quite blushed. He had very pretty eyes, doctor.”
But the anecdote I was going to relate was this. Most simple persons, like myself, imagine that prime ministers of such a country as England, when promoted to so elevated a station, are only moved by the noble ambition of their country’s good, and, from the first moment to the last, are ever pondering on the important measures that may best promote it. No such thing. Let us hear what Lady Hester Stanhope herself had to say on this subject.
“The very first thing Mr. Pitt did,” said she, “after coming into office the second time, was to provide for Mr. Rice. We were just got to Downing Street, and everything was in disorder. I was in the drawing-room: Mr. Pitt, I believe, had dined out. When he came home, ‘Hester,’ said he, ‘we must think of our dear, good friend Rice. I have desired the list to be brought to me to-morrow morning, and we will see what suits him.’—‘I think we had better see now,’ I replied. ‘Oh, no! it is too late now.’—‘Not at all,’ I rejoined; and I rang the bell, and desired the servant to go to the Treasury, and bring me the list.
“On examining it, I found three places for which he was eligible. I then sent for Rice. ‘Rice,’ said I, ‘here are three places to be filled up. One is a place in the Treasury, where you may fag on, and, by the time you are forty-five or fifty, you may be master of twenty or twenty-five thousand pounds. There is another will bring you into contact with poor younger sons of nobility: you will be invited out, get tickets for the Opera, and may make yourself a fine gentleman. The third is in the Customs: there you must fag a great deal, but you will make a great deal of money: it is a searcher’s place.’
“Rice, after considering awhile, said—‘As for the Treasury, that will not suit me, my lady; for I must go on plodding to the end of my life. The second place your ladyship mentioned will throw me out of my sphere: I am not fit for fine folks; and, if you please, I had rather take the third.’ So, the very next morning, I got all his papers signed by everybody except Mr. Long, and they made some excuses that he was not come, or was gone, or something; but I would hear of no delay, and desired them to find him.
“Rice went on swimmingly, doctor, for a long time, and made one morning a seizure that brought for his share £500. But I had given him some very long instructions, and he was not like you, for he listened to my advice. Sometimes, when I was teaching him how he was to act, he would say, ‘My lady, I believe that is enough for this time: I don’t think my poor head will contain more; but I’ll come again.’ I told him he was to learn the specific gravity of bodies, that when they told him (for example) it was pepper, he might know by the volume that it was not gunpowder or cochineal.