Vesper Talks to Girls

by Laura A. Knott

How far can that project thy soul on its lone way?”

The physical life always should be subordinated to the mental and the spiritual life, yet the body must command our respect because it is the house in which the spirit dwells. “Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost, which is in you?” One of your first duties, then, is to take care of your health and to make your body the efficient, ready instrument of your will. You have no more important duty, not only to self, but to others, than to obey the laws of health, the most fundamental of which pertain to exercise, sleep, rest, and food. It is astonishing how few people, especially how few women, there are who do obey these simple laws, the importance of which ought to be apparent to every one. Nature’s disapproval of such disobedience is shown promptly, and the penalty she inflicts is inexorable. If ever I feel inclined to doubt the wisdom of any of Nature’s ways—which I really do not—it is when I see that girls, young, ignorant, and inexperienced, have so important a matter as their health given into their own keeping, though their bad judgment or wilfulness may have consequences so dire! Be willing to deny yourself, to put forth effort, to pay a very high price if need be, for a healthy body.

The desire for social intercourse is natural and right, and the person who shuns the society of others is abnormal; yet social intercourse probably offers, in one form or another, most of the dangers which beset both young women and young men while in school or college. Those who fail ignominiously and are obliged to withdraw, fail, not so often because of lack of ability or insufficient preparation as because they are swept off their feet by the multitude of their new engagements and social activities. The mind is full of a thousand other things and study is deferred until a more convenient season, which never comes. In the college, where comparatively little supervision over students is exercised, this has disastrous consequences, though in the school, with its closer supervision, the student is often saved from himself. It seems hardly necessary to say that your friends and your pleasures must not monopolize your whole life. With the sensible student, work comes first and pleasure afterward. One of the greatest temptations, when you are surrounded by pleasant friends, is to fritter time away. Hours, days, months pass by and leave very little that makes life permanently richer and stronger. Sometimes, indeed, the personality seems almost to disappear, merged in that of others. I have known girls who were miserable if they were left alone for half an hour. The reason is that they have no resources within themselves. They are parasites and derive their sustenance entirely from others. Such a life is not providing itself with the intellectual and spiritual resources which we all need to have at our command, and which should be gained in youth or they are not likely to be gained at all. Be friendly, be sociable, give your love freely, but preserve your own individuality and independence.

In no way do we reveal ourselves more surely than in our choice of companions. Be slow in choosing your nearest and dearest friends. Many a girl has been very unhappy because she rushed impetuously into a friendship from which she afterward had to extricate herself at the cost of great suffering both to herself and to her friend. Take plenty of time in selecting those who are to be your life friends, and remember that here, as everywhere, “All is not gold that glitters.”

The intellectual life above all else distinguishes man from the brute creation. Schools and colleges exist chiefly for the purpose of developing the intellectual life of the young, though one sometimes meets students who would admit the truth of that statement very reluctantly if at all. A well-disciplined and well-furnished mind is one of the chief satisfactions of life. Changing fortune cannot take from us our mental treasure. Its value never diminishes, but increases, and never seems greater than when other things upon which we relied have been snatched from us. If we place reliance upon money, it may take to itself wings and fly away. We cannot be sure of keeping health. Our friends may be taken from us. Is it not the part of wisdom, in looking forward and preparing for what one hopes may be a successful and happy future, to ask what are the “durable satisfactions” of life? These should not be sacrificed for ephemeral pleasures.

The ability to focus a well-trained intelligence upon any problem in hand is one for which we should be willing to pay a high price. Intellectual capacity and a cultivated mind are not acquired without effort, and cannot be secured by merely sitting through lectures or recitations. The student who has a true sense of values will plan her life in so systematic and orderly a way that her use of time will be determined by something more than present inclination. You must remember that in order to have this, you must give up that. One of the hardest things for the inexperienced to learn is that some very good things have to be sacrificed in order that we may not miss better things. All through life this is so, and there is no advantage in deferring the time when it must be learned. To your daily work, then, give your best self, realizing that if you fail in that, you will derive but little comfort from the fact that you have had some success in other things. Mental concentration and correct methods of work should be the first lessons learned, and they should be learned with thoroughness.

Lastly, we have a moral and spiritual nature. One might have superb intellectual powers and brilliant social gifts, yet if he lacked character, these would bring him neither content nor success in any large sense. Character is the foundation upon which all success worthy the name must rest. If the foundation be insecure, it matters little how fine the superstructure. When the writer of old said, “With all thy getting, get wisdom,” he meant something more than knowledge. Wisdom means insight into life and into human nature. Still more, it implies some comprehension of “the ways of God with men,” that is, of the profound laws which underlie the government of the moral and spiritual universe. The greatest struggle of all, to the student, should be the struggle for the ideal life. In moral and spiritual stature, are you small? Then it is your sacred duty to become large. Where will there ever be a better opportunity than under the ideal conditions that surround you, with stimulating lessons, inspiring teachers, understanding and appreciative friends and leisure to use all of these for the attainment of personal power?

Remember that character is not something that will take care of itself. You do not really expect to acquire knowledge for which you do not work. You admit that if you would have intellectual capacity you must study and train the mind. Yet it is hard for you to comprehend that you have anything to do with the development of your own character. Do not believe that honor, courage, generosity and courtesy come by chance.

There is this to be said, however, about the development of character. It is, to use Woodrow Wilson’s phrase, “a by-product.” As he says, it comes whether you will or not as a consequence of a life devoted to duty. You do not deliberately say, “I will improve my character.” What you do say is, “I will do the duty that plainly lies before me. I will not shirk it. I will not defer it.” In this way, and perhaps only in this way, does character grow.

There is no royal road to high character any more than there is to learning. Indeed, there is no royal road to anything worth while. “What wouldst thou?” says the old proverb; “Pay for it and take it.” Character is formed from within, by the efforts and strivings and aspirations of the individual. The will is made strong by choosing the right, not by having the right thrust upon it.