Oct. 5, 1983… The day began for me at 4:45 A.M. I figured I'd allow ample time for my face to emerge and get a quick bite to eat, but I figured wrong. I departed in a flurry at 5:45 without having eaten. Dad drove unusually slow, or so it seemed. We got to the airport with sufficient time for me to go to the bathroom and then some. We weren't rushed in the least. Les came too, but I was too nervous to really talk and feel "civil."
On board at 6:30 I was seated by the window in an MVA plane. I spoke with a man with a complete beard and moustache en route. He asked for my phone number. I hesitatingly replied that I had no pen or paper but that my parents were in the phone book. "I really hope he won't call… what would I need with a date?!"
Panic stricken, once again, when I reached O'Hare, I rushed excitedly to my next gate of departure, and there spent 45 minutes of anticipation. After boarding, I endured 15 or more minutes of sheer panic due to the stuffy atmosphere of the DC 8. After take-off it cooled down quickly. . . I was quite relieved.
Breakfast proved to be good; I rested a bit. . . I was fortunately situated on the window seat, the middle seat was empty and the aisle seat occupied by a slightly corpulent and very silent businessman. (He, by the way, finished his breakfast entirely.)
Upon landing I put both my bags in a locker… the wait proved to be 6 hours. Jon came. . . he looked "real good." It was a super and balmy night. . . we walked to the Seasons restaurant. Jon treated.
Oct. 6, 1983… Things got pretty emotional for a while as we tried to sum up the situation between us. Situations change and they will never be the same again. I love Jon, but neither of us are ready for a relationship. Marriage makes all things so dreadfully black and white. My health is the foremost difficulty, as well as the miles that separate us. I sometimes don't feel capable of being a good wife, nor do I feel that I'd be able to live so far away from my family… I need the support. I felt better, nevertheless, after our discussion…. at another time I had written down my thoughts concerning our relationship. (Just as one's mind cannot long remain inactive, so also will our love (for each other) change as the years progress toward eternity. If love indeed be true, change can only enhance its fullness, and this need never be feared, and must never be ignored.) This kind of love, for us, could never be.
Oct. 8, 1983… A hazy day. . . headed for Yosemite. . . had enjoyed Saratoga and a drive into the mountains the night before. . . had dinner at a place with a Scottish atmosphere. After taking pictures, hazy or no, we started back. . . bought 2 pumpkins. . . during the week days I spent my time reading… Jon did home work in the evenings… we had dinner "in," at Wendy's, at a Chinese restaurant, at Marie Calendars… I showed him how to hem his trousers. . . we carved our pumpkins. . . mine looked like Foo Man Choo. . . his looked like a mask. . . they are both neat. I took pictures of them. . .
Oct. 12, 1983… Today's the day to go home… Jon came for me at noon… we ate at McDonald's. I read a bit of this diary to him en route to the airport. As usual, it was difficult to say goodbye. I have a 2 hour wait before boarding my plane… Dad picked me up and we had a late snack at Perkin's. . . when Norm came home from his night-shift we talked til 2:00 A.M.
Oct. 22, 1983… Was amazed to realize that some of my friends feel I'm a prisoner in my own home! It is definitely not the case…
Oct. 31, 1983… Happy Halloween! After chores I went for a walk in the woods with my camera equipment. . . wish I didn't get so out of puff when I climb hills or just walk… took a nap… this is the 3rd pumpkin I've carved this year!