The women being always employed, without ever being diverted from their duty, or seduced by the gallantries of lovers, never think of objecting to the propriety of a custom, in which they have been constantly brought up. Never having seen any example that contradicted it, they have not the least idea of varying from it. Thus being submissive from the habit, as well as from reason, they, by their docility, maintain that peace in their families, which they find established upon entering them.
[SECTION III.]
Of their Marriages, and Distinction of Ranks.
Paternal authority, as I have elsewhere observed, is not less sacred and inviolable than the pre-eminence of the men. It still subsists among the Natchez, such as it was in the first ages of the world. The children belong to the father, and while he lives they are under his power. They live with him, they, their wives, and their children; the same hut contains the whole family. The old man alone commands there, and nothing but death puts an end to his empire. As these people have seldom or rather never any differences among them, the paternal authority appears in nothing more conspicuous than in the marriages.
When the boys and girls arrive at the perfect age of puberty, they visit each other familiarly, and are suffered so to do. The girls, sensible that they will be no longer mistresses of their heart, when once they are married, know how to dispose of it to advantage, and form their wardrobe by the sale of their favours; for there, as well as in other countries, nothing for nothing. The lover, far from having any thing to object to this, on the contrary, rates the merit of his future spouse, in proportion to the fruits she has produced. But when they are married they have no longer any intrigues, neither the husband nor the wife, because their heart is no longer their own. They may divorce their wives; it is, however, so rare to see the man and wife part, that during the eight years I lived in their neighbourhood, I knew but one example of it, and then each took with them the children of their own sex.
If a young man has obtained a girl's consent, and they desire to marry, it is not their fathers, and much less their mothers, or male or female relations who take upon them to, conclude the match; it is the heads of the two families alone, who are usually great-grandfathers, and sometimes more. These two old men have an interview, in which, after the young man has formally made a demand of the girl, they examine if there be any relation between the two parties, and if any, what degree it is; for they do not marry within the third degree. Notwithstanding this interview, and the two parties be found not within the prohibited degrees, yet if the proposed wife be disagreeable to the father, grandfather, &c. of the husband, the match is never concluded. On the other hand, ambition, avarice, and the other passions, so common with us, never stifle in the breasts of the fathers those dictates of nature, which make us desire to see ourselves perpetuated in our offspring, nor influence them to thwart their children, improperly, and much less to force their inclinations. By an admirable harmony, very worthy of our imitation, they only marry those who love one another, and those who love one another, are only married when their parents agree to it. It is rare for young men to marry before they be five-and-twenty. Till they arrive at that age they are looked upon as too weak, without understanding and experience.
When the marriage-day is once fixed, preparations are made for it both by the men and women; the men go a hunting, and the women prepare the maiz, and deck out the young man's cabin to the best of their power. On the wedding-day the old man on the part of the girl leaves his hut, and conducts the bride to the hut of the bridegroom; his whole family follow him in order and silence; those who are inclined to laugh or be merry, indulging themselves only in a smile.
He finds before the other hut all the relations of the bridegroom, who receive and salute him with their usual expression of congratulation, namely, hoo, hoo, repeated several times. When he enters the hut, the old man on the part of the bridegroom says to him in their language, are you there? to which he answers, yes. He is next desired to sit down, and then not a word passes for near ten minutes, it being one of their prudent customs to suffer a guest to rest himself a little after his arrival, before they begin a conversation; and besides, they look upon the time spent in compliments as thrown away.
After both the old men are fully rested, they rise, and the bridegroom and bride appearing before them, they ask them, if they love each other? and if they are willing to take one another for man and wife? observing to them at the same time, that they ought not to marry unless they propose to live amicably together; that nobody forces them, and that as they are each other's free choice, they will be thrust out of the family if they do not live in peace. After this remonstrance the father of the bridegroom delivers the present which his son is to make into his hands, the bride's father at the same time placing himself by her side. The bridegroom then addresses the bride; "Will you have me for your husband?" she answers, "Most willingly, and it gives me joy; love me, as well as I love you; for I love, and ever will love none but you." At these words the bridegroom covers the head of the bride with the present which he received from his father, and says to her, "I love you, and have therefore taken you for my wife, and this I give to your parents, to purchase you." He then gives the present to the bride's father.