Book of Etiquette, Volume I

by Lillian Eichler Watson

Usually letters of introduction are not presented in person, but sent with the card of the man or woman to be introduced. This relieves the ceremony of that awkwardness which usually follows when someone presents a letter of introduction and waits while it is being read. If one does not wish to send it through the mails, the letter may be left with one's card at the door of the one to whom it is addressed.

When the letter of introduction is from a gentleman to a lady, or rather when the letter introduces a gentleman to a lady, he invariably calls in the afternoon and sends up the letter with his card. If the lady is not at home, he may slip the card into the same envelope as the letter, and leave it with the servant to be delivered. A gentleman also calls to present a letter of introduction to a member of his own sex.

A woman who wishes to present a letter of introduction to another woman, calls personally and leaves the letter with her own card, or slips her card into the envelope, seals it, and sends it through the mails. Either method of presentation is correct. However, when the letter is addressed to a gentleman, she does not call, unless it is some very special and unusual occasion, but trusts the letter to the mails for safe delivery.

ACKNOWLEDGING A LETTER OF INTRODUCTION

A letter of introduction requires immediate recognition in some form. Either a call or an invitation should be made within three or four days. If it is impossible to honor a letter of introduction by the usual form of visiting or entertaining then it is absolutely essential that a prompt and adequate explanation should be written to the author and bearer of the letter.

Ordinarily, when the bearer of a letter of introduction is a woman, a call is made within three days. This call is followed by the offer of some hospitality, usually a luncheon or tea. A gentleman calls upon a lady or upon another gentleman as soon as he receives a letter of introduction. But a lady, instead of making a call, sends an invitation to the gentleman who is introduced to her by means of a letter.

Any delay in acknowledging a letter of introduction is uncivil, both to the person who wrote the letter and the one being introduced. If one is invalided, a short note should be written explaining why a call cannot be made, and arranging for a meeting as early as circumstances permit. But to wait a week or two before acknowledging a letter of introduction, and then writing to explain, is to show lack of good breeding and ignorance of the laws of good conduct.

It is a mark of courtesy to write to the person who brought about the acquaintance with a new friend by means of a letter of introduction, thanking him or her for the note that inspired the friendship.

MODEL LETTERS OF INTRODUCTION

A letter of introduction should be simple and to the point. It should also be friendly, cordial and explanatory. It is placed in a single envelope, unsealed, with the full name and address of the person to whom the bearer is introduced. Here are some letters that are offered merely as suggestions. Of course they may be changed and added to, to meet certain conditions: