There is one law of good conduct that cannot be over-emphasized—and that is the law of making oneself inconspicuous. A man or woman who is the "center of attraction" when the occasion does not merit it, cannot claim the distinction of being entirely well-bred. There seems to be a certain dignified simplicity and modesty in dress, speech and behavior that distinguishes well-bred people and enables them to move with ease and unconscious grace among people of every status and position.
ARRIVING LATE
Whether it be the theater, opera, lecture or some other public entertainment, it is exceedingly bad form to arrive late. People who are considerate always make it a point to arrive five or ten minutes before the hour set for the performance.
When one is unavoidably detained and reaches the theater after the curtain has been raised, it is polite to remain at the rear of the auditorium until the first intermission. It is permissible to take one's place quickly and quietly while the audience is applauding; but it is rude and inconsiderate to attempt to find your place while the performers are on the stage and the attention of the audience has been fixed.
It is good form for the man or woman who arrives late to excuse himself or herself to the people who are disturbed while the vacant place is being reached. One may say, "I am sorry to disturb you," or, "Pardon me." Those who are seated should rise to allow passage if the place is very narrow, but if there is sufficient room for them to pass without stumbling it is better for those who are already seated to keep their places, drawing aside to facilitate matters for the new-comers.
ABOUT WRAPS
It is customary for a woman to slip off her wrap in the lobby and carry it on her arm to her place, where it may either be placed over the back of her chair or folded in her lap. Some big theaters now have checking rooms for women, where wraps may be left until after the performance. Other theaters arrange for a wrap-checking service in the ladies' dressing-room. Individual preference must decide whether the wrap shall be checked or kept with one. But to stand up after the play has begun, and leisurely divest oneself of one's wraps, is a breach of good manners. If her wrap is a light one a woman may keep it on until she is seated and then slip it off her shoulders and let it fall over the back of her chair.
Hat and veil are usually removed after one has been comfortably seated. Or, if one prefers, they may be checked in the dressing-room. In the evening, when décolleté is worn with an evening veil and no hat, the veil may be dropped over the shoulders and kept throughout the evening.
A very common fault is to begin to put on wraps and hats before the performance is over. This is rude to the performers and unjust to the people around you. Wraps should not be touched until the curtain has fallen for the last time, even though one is anxious to leave. Politeness is a vital law of good conduct, and certainly nothing could be more impolite than to interrupt an actor or lecturer by fussing with clothing.
Gentlemen usually check their hats and coats in the lobby; otherwise they remove them both before taking their places. The hat is deposited under the chair, and the coat may either be folded and placed over the knees, or over the back of the seat.