“I am pleased with myself. I am swift—swifter than the ox, swifter than the horse, swifter than the electric car. What would the world do without me? I serve everyone, I go everywhere——”
Just here he was interrupted by the deep booming voice of a freight steamer lying alongside the wharf. “Tooooot” is what the voice said, “you ridiculous landlubber! You go everywhere? What about the water? Can you go to France and back again? It’s only I who can haul the world’s goods across the ocean! And even where you can go, you never get trusted if they can possibly trust me, now do you? Did you ever think why men use river steamers instead of you? Did you ever think why men cut the great Panama Canal so that sea could flow into sea? Well, it’s simply because they’re smart and prefer me to you when they can get me. You eat too much coal with your speed,—that’s what the trouble is with you—you ridiculous landlubber!”
This long speech made the old steamer quite hoarse so he cleared his throat with a long “Toooot” and sank into silence.
“Of course, what he says is true,” thought the engine. “At the same time it is equally true that on land I do serve everyone, I go everywhere——”
Just here he was interrupted again by a most unexpected noise. It sounded half like a steel giggle, half like a brass hiccough. It made the engine uneasy. He was sure someone was laughing at him. Majestically he turned his headlight till it lighted up a funny little automobile who was laughing and laughing and shaking frantically like this and going “zzzzz.”
“You silly little road beetle,” shouted the great engine, “what on earth’s the matter with you?”
The automobile gave one violent shake, turned off his spark and said in an orderly voice, “It struck my funny bone to hear you say you went everywhere on land, that’s all. Don’t you realize you’re an old fuss budget with your steam and your boiler and your fire and what not? You’re tied to your rails and if everything about your old tracks isn’t kept just so you tumble over into a ditch or do some fool thing. Now I’m the one that can endure real hardships. Sparks and gasoline! you just sit right there, you baby, you railclinger, and watch me take that hill! Honk, honk!” And he was off up the hill.
The engine slowly turned back his headlight till the light shone full on his shiny rails. He thought of what he had heard. “He called me a railclinger—yes, that I am. How can that preposterous little beetle run without tracks? I’m afraid he’s more wonderful than I.”
Now the automobile went jouncing and bouncing up the rough road puffing merrily and thinking, “I’m mightily pleased with myself. Look at the way I climb this hill. There’s nothing really so wonderful as I——”
Just then he heard a sound that made his engine boil with fright. Dzdzdzdzdzr—it seemed to come right out of the sky. He got all his courage together and turned his searchlights up. The sight instantly killed his engine. Above him soared a giant aeroplane. It floated, it wheeled, it rose, it dropped. It looked serene, strong and swift. Down, down came the great thing. Through the terrific droning the automobile could just make out these words: