“I am at variance with my lover on a subject that I am afraid deeply concerns our future happiness. My lover is a Unitarian while I and my family have always been Episcopalians. We differ on religious matters now, and I am afraid that our differences will be more serious after marriage. My family and myself have all been at him to join our church, but he won’t do it.
“Ought I to insist upon his accepting my faith with me or should that be left open for discussion after we are married?
“Grace P.”
If the question of a belief is more important to you than the affection of your lover we advise you to relinquish him at once. True love will not let such subjects as religion or politics interfere with its tranquillity. No doubt your lover’s belief is quite as precious to him as yours is to you and if you cannot win him over by intelligent, kindly arguments you had better allow him to follow his own inclinations. Always remember that the right to disagree belongs to every individual, but there is no reason for such disagreement being a source of misery. In a general way, we would advise settling all such matters before marriage. Bickering is bad enough when people are not bound to each other by any tie, but it is ten-fold worse when there is a compact between them.
Your lover has as much right to his religious views as you have to yours, and the sooner you recognize that right—the sooner you will have proved your own true womanliness.
“I have always been called a ‘flirt’ by my girl friends just because I liked to have a good time with the boys. There are four or five of them now that want me to marry them, but there is only one that I really care anything about, and I’m not sure that I care anything for him. I do feel badly when I see him looking disconsolate when I am flirting with some one else, and I am always sorry when I have hurt his feelings.
“Do you think this is love, and if I married him, do you think I could be a good wife to him? I would not like to give him the worst of the bargain.
“Hattie B. S.”