“One of the best fellows in the world has asked me to become his wife. I esteem him highly—I might almost say that I love him if I had not decided long ago to leave the word ‘love’ out of my dictionary. I feel that I would be happy indeed if I were his wife, but there is a chapter in my life that I dread to tell him, and still I think too much of him to marry him without being perfectly candid. Won’t you tell me what to do? I am heart-broken over the situation.
“Marie W. S.”
It is much better to be frank before marriage than to make two people unhappy after. If this young man really loves you he will forgive much, endure much, condone much, and his affection will still survive in spite of all. If his regard stands the test you will have a husband and lover of whom you may be proud. If it does not you may feel assured that he would have probably made your married life miserable, and that you have saved both him and yourself considerable unhappiness. The man that will listen to your revelation and continue to love you, has in that one act proven his value. The man who does not, likewise proves that his affection is a matter of circumstance, and not the unfailing, all-enduring type that is really of worth. There is an old proverb, “Tell the truth and fear naught,” that exactly fits your case.
“I am in love with one of the most charming girls in the United States, but I am not quite sure that she loves me. I have read lots of your good advice to young women, so I hope you will be willing to give me some. I want this girl for my wife, but, frankly, I am afraid to ask her. I have more of her society than any one else as it is, and if she doesn’t accept me I am afraid I’ll lose it all. Now, won’t you please advise me what to do.
“Edward H.”
You seem to be a very diffident young man, Edward. If you really love this girl, why don’t you tell her so, and see what she says? “Faint heart never won fair lady.” If she doesn’t love you she will only say “no,” and then you can look for another who will perhaps appreciate your timid nature.
“He either fears his fate too much—
Or his deserts are small
Who dreads to put it to the touch