With the short reign of Mme. de X—— the influence of Murat and the Bonapartes came for the time being to an end; for, on the reconciliation of the Emperor with his wife, his former confidence in her revived, and he heard from her lips of all the petty schemes of which she had been the victim and himself the object. I profited in a measure by the change; yet the impression which had been made could not be altogether effaced, and the Emperor retained his conviction that M. de Rémusat and I were incapable of the sort of devotion that he required, a devotion claiming the sacrifice both of personal inclinations and of those convenances which he despised. He had a right, perhaps, to expect the former: one ought to renounce a Court life, unless one can make it the only sphere of one’s thoughts and actions; and neither my husband nor I was capable of doing so. I have always longed to attach myself with all my heart to the duties of my state, and at this period I was too heart-sore not to feel some constraint in performing those which devolved on me. I began to see that the Emperor was not the man I had taken him for. Already he inspired me with fear rather than with affection; and, in proportion as my assiduity in obeying him increased, I felt the sharp pain of vanishing illusions, and I suffered beforehand from all that I foresaw. The quaking of the earth on which we stood alarmed both M. de Rémusat and myself, and he especially resigned himself with difficulty to a life which was extremely unpleasing to him.
When I recall these troubles now, how happy I am to see him, quiet and contented, at the head of affairs in an important province, honorably fulfilling the duty of a good citizen, and serving his country usefully![[3]] Can there be a worthier employment of the faculties of an enlightened and high-hearted man, or a greater contrast with the restless, troublesome, not to say ridiculous life which has to be led, without one moment’s intermission, in the courts of kings? I say court, because they are all alike. No doubt the difference of character in sovereigns has some influence over the lives of those who surround them; there are shades of difference in the homage exacted by Louis XIV., our own King Louis XVIII., the Emperor Alexander, or Bonaparte. But, though masters may differ, courtiers are everywhere the same; the same passions are in play, for vanity is invariably their secret spring. Jealousy, the longing to supplant others, the fear of being stopped on the road, or finding others preferred to one’s self—these do, and always will, cause similar perturbations; and I am profoundly persuaded that any one, who, dwelling in a palace, wishes to exercise his faculties of thinking and of feeling, must be unhappy.
Toward the end of this winter the Imperial Court was again augmented. A number of persons, among whom I could name some who are now inexorable to all who ever were in the Emperor’s service, were eagerly bidding for place. The Empress, M. de Talleyrand, and M. de Rémusat received their requests, and handed long lists to Bonaparte, who would smile when he saw in the same column the names of ci-devant Liberals, of soldiers who had been jealous of his promotion, and of gentlemen who, after having jeered at what they called our farce of royalty, were now all begging to be allowed to play parts in it. Some of these petitions were granted. Mesdames de Turenne, de Montalivet, de Bouillé, Deveaux, and Marescot were appointed Ladies-in-Waiting; MM. Hédouville, de Croij, de Mercy d’Argenteau, de Tournon, and de Bondy were made Chamberlains to the Emperor; MM. de Béarn, de Courtomer, and the Prince de Gavre, Chamberlains to the Empress; M. de Canisy, Equerry; M. de Bausset, Prefect of the Palace, etc.
This numerous Court consisted of various elements foreign to each other, but all were brought to one level by fear of the all-powerful master. There was little rivalry among the ladies; they were strangers to each other, and did not become intimate. The Empress treated them all alike. Mme. de la Rochefoucauld, light-hearted and easy-tempered, showed no jealousy toward any one. The Mistress of the Robes was amiable, silent, and nothing more. Day by day I drew back from the somewhat dangerous friendship of the Empress; but I must own that such was her evenness of temper, so gracious was her bearing, that the Court circle by which she was surrounded was free from disturbance or jealousy.
It was not so in the case of the Emperor—but then he himself designedly kept up a state of disquiet. For instance, M. de Talleyrand, who had slightly diminished the importance of M. de Rémusat’s position, not with the intention of injuring him, but in order to satisfy some new-comers who were jealous of my husband, was brought into closer contact with him afterward, and began to appreciate his worth and to show some interest in him. Bonaparte perceived this. The slightest appearance of private friendship alarmed him, and he took the minutest precautions to prevent anything of the kind; so he spoke to my husband one day in a tone of unusual cordiality. “Take care,” said he, “M. de Talleyrand seems to be making advances to you; but I know to a certainty that he bears you no good will.”
“And why should M. de Talleyrand bear me ill will?” said my husband to me, on repeating these words. We could not tell why, but this speech gave us a feeling of distrust, which was all that the Emperor wanted.
Such was the state of things at the Emperor’s Court in the spring of 1805. I will now retrace my steps and give an account of the momentous resolution that was come to concerning the crown of Italy.
| [3] | At the time I write, September 1818, my husband is Prefect of the Départment du Nord. |