Just before this Jit had come over from India, as he was going to marry the daughter of the first Hindu Maharajah, the Gaikwar of Baroda. They had been fond of each other for some years, but the Princess’s parents were against the marriage because we were Brahmos and they were Hindus. The Princess came with her parents over to Europe, and Jit followed. It was a most romantic story, as the young couple had seen very little of each other. Yet their love was so strong and true that they promised each other they would marry no one else.
On the 26th August Jit and Indira were married. The ceremonies, civil and religious, took place at the Buckingham Palace Hotel and the Registrar’s office. I could not help acknowledging the truth of my father’s words that the hand of God is always manifest. In this seemingly impossible union, beset throughout with opposition, I again saw the triumph of the New Dispensation, for my daughter-in-law gave up riches and caste to follow her husband, for love of him. Indira is very clever and very pretty. She knows several languages and has travelled a great deal; for years I had been wanting her to be my daughter-in-law, and I was as fond of her as of my own daughters.
I motored down to Cromer with a friend of mine, Miss Scott, and on our return, the doctor who was attending Rajey gave me hopeful news. He said Rajey was enjoying his food, and in three weeks’ time would be out and about. He assured me that we could return to India at the end of October. He even added: “I don’t see why His Highness should not play polo again.”
On Friday I went to tea with Lady Carmichael’s brother, and after dinner I went back again to ask how Rajey was. The doctor said he had a little pain but not much, and he hoped he would be better the next morning. Unfortunately Dr. Russell had to go to London for a few days. Rajey loved him as a friend and had great faith in him.
Very early on Saturday morning a note came from the doctor asking me to go over at once. Over my nightgown I tied on a sari and put over all a thick coat, and in my slippers walked from the hotel to the house with Miss Scott, who was an angel to me that day, and stayed with me in those hours of anguish. I don’t remember how, but I managed to get to the door of the house. In the hall, where I met the doctor, I fell. They helped me into the drawing-room and gave me some tea which I could not drink. The doctor asked me if I could be brave and quiet as my son wanted to see me. When Rajey felt the pain, the only thing he had said was: “Nurse, I am in great pain, I want my mother.” I kept back my tears and followed the doctor upstairs to the room where Rajey was lying. Never shall I forget my anguish when I looked at him. His lovely eyes were unchanged, but his voice was very faint. “Mother,” he whispered, as I bent over him, “I am sinking … I know it.”
I too knew it, and oh! how bitter was the knowledge! “Darling, darling,” I said, hardly able to speak. He clasped me in his arms, and his face was close to mine. “Raj Rajendra … you know, mother … even the King of kings must die.” The long morning passed. I was with him the whole time. Once he said: “I’m leaving you behind, mother.” He asked me about Jit and his wife, and also if his youngest uncle were there.
Dr. Risien Russell and my daughter arrived late in the morning. Rajey was pleased to see the doctor, and when he saw my youngest brother he caught hold of his hand tight as if it were the last grip of his friendship. I felt that if Dr. Russell had not been there, I should have had no friend in my great trouble. He was a godsend to me.
On Sunday, at midnight, surrounded by those who were near and dear to him, Rajey breathed his last. Thirty-one years ago this boy had brought me every possible happiness. Now the world is dark and gloomy, and I do not know how I shall travel the last part of my journey, so heavy-laden am I with my grief. Rajey was not an ordinary son to me. His birth had made every difference in my life. The Cooch Beharis would never have been so friendly towards me had it not been for my Rajey’s coming; neither could I have had so happy a home had Rajey not arrived. God gave him to me and God has taken him away. He was the most precious gift I had; but I know, I believe that I shall meet him again in the Land of Everlasting Happiness. These pangs of my heart will cease when I am called to be with my two precious ones.
Rajey was dressed in his chupkan and a sacred coloured shawl was thrown over him. Wreaths of flowers were sent by kind friends, and his room looked no longer like a mourning room but like a paradise.
My Rajey had put on the garment of immortality. His painful journey was ended, and in the heaven whither his spirit had flown, he had already been welcomed by his father, and together they await me there.